


of miraculous events

by Abstract_Thoughts



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe- Miraculous Ladybug, Established Relationship, He needs love, I mean they're still The Bad Guys but they're like well-rounded characters, If you need triggers tagged hmu, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M, Miraculous Ladybug AU, Multi, Past Character Death, Protective Siblings, Rivals to Friends to Lovers, Sibling Love, Sibling Rivalry, Slow Burn, Sympathetic Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Sympathetic Deceit Sanders, also character thomas is here!, does it count as a crossover if its only the kwamis, doesnt really follow miraculous' plot tho, oh my god they were roommates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-25
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:33:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 21,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21562282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Abstract_Thoughts/pseuds/Abstract_Thoughts
Summary: In Paris, there are several things that will probably happen every day:1. Someone will get akumatized, or there will be a sentimonster2. La Mariquita and Noir will be there to fix everything.and 3. Logan Addams will try to not strangle his roommate.Of course, his roommate is also La Mariquita. and he's Noir. But neither of them know that, and neither does Roman's brother.Who is also La Peon.Nothing can ever be easy, can it?
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil & Creativity | Roman & Logic | Logan & Morality | Patton & Thomas Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Deceit Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Deceit Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Deceit Sanders, romantic LAMP - Relationship
Comments: 39
Kudos: 81





	1. Storm Cloud

**Author's Note:**

> wow me actually writing something???? i didn't know that was possible lmao  
> anyway this first chapter is more of an introduction to roman and logan's dynamic more than anything (a la stormy weather) so lets go gamers

“So, any ideas?” Noir asked, leaping across the space between apartment blocks. The akuma shrieked as he lost where they were. Noir made a silent promise to apologize to Virgil once this was over.

“Well, I do have one!” La Mariquita responded, pulling his partner behind a chimney. He thrust his weapon to the sky, “ _Lucky Charm_!”

A small piece of paper fluttered into his hand.

“Ah,” said Noir, “a ticket,”

La Mariquita held it up to the light, “.... To _Beauty and the Beast_?”

“It is showing at the Palais-Royal but-”

“Oh, of _course_!” La Mariquita spun his yo-yo, building up momentum, “Hold him off for me, will you?”

Noir spluttered, “No you can’t just- _Mariquita we need a plan_!” but his partner was already bouncing over the rooftops.

...

Roman de Laurens ducked into the Théâtre du Palais-Royal. It was a beautiful building- oh to be able to perform here one day!- but he was not here to ogle. He was in the process of figuring out a sob story to tell security when he saw the man of the hour walk in, looking particularly frazzled.

Thomas Sanders locked eyes with him, and the frazzled look turned to confusion, then a very distinct _uh oh_.

“Thomas!” Roman called, making his way across the lobby, “Can I steal you for a moment?” he didn’t wait for an answer, grabbing Thomas’ arm and pulling him into an alcove.

“Roman,” Thomas began, “I thought there was-”

“An akuma, yeah, but!” he raised the tickets from the Lucky Charm, red dotted with black.

Thomas sighed, “Oh geez, okay,” he pulled his backpack off of his shoulder and pulled out a hat box. Inside, the Miracle Box opened, “Go ahead,”

Roman snickered, “Missing your little speeches,”

“Roman, we don’t have ti-”

“Yeah, I _know_!” he snapped, then grumbled, “Sorry,”

“It’s alright, buddy,”

Roman hummed, thinking for a moment. This was Virgil- akumatized into Storm Cloud, mind you, but still Virgil- and there was a distinct lack of a sentimonster. Ether La Peon was feeling lazy today or they were just banking on Virgil’s power alone. Regardless, he was prone to spur-of-the-moment reactions, and with the way his power was overpowering he would need to-

That’s it!

He grabbed the Dragon, slipping it on.

“Greetings!” Longg bowed dramatically.

“Hey,” Roman grinned at him.

“I hate to rush you, Roman,” Tikki said, “but if we don’t get back out there-!”

“I know, I know...” he grit his teeth.

Thomas said, “You’re sure you want to unify them?”

“Best plan I’ve got,”

“Then I trust you,” he put his hand on Roman’s shoulder, “Good luck,” with the Miracle box back in his bag, Thomas ducked out of the alcove, and Roman moved into the bathroom. There was no one in here. Perfect.

“Alright then,” he said, “Tikki, Longg, unify!”

...

The Eiffel Tower had been evacuated twenty minutes ago when the akuma had been spotted. Now, on the first observation deck, Noir desperately attempted to keep the aforementioned akuma “busy”.

 _Keep him busy_. Honestly, when this was over and done with he was going to give Mariquita one hell of a talking to.

“And you’re sure you don’t know where he is?” Storm Cloud sneered.

“Yes, absolutely,” Noir responded with a straight face- or, at least, as straight as he could with these winds whipping around them. What was in it that it caused such little visibility? Was it dirt? Dust? No, not dark enough. This was a dark, poignant purple. Was it simply the power of the Butterfly Miraculous? He made a note to interrogate Papilion on the subject when they captured them, “Why would I know where some random college student i-?” Storm Cloud flicked his wrist, and Noir found himself unable to move.

“Amazing how that feels, isn’t it? Helpless, terrified.... No great hero like you could ever understand, I suppose,”

Noir grit his teeth, “What’s your name?”

“I-” there was a moment of silence, “Why do you care?”

“You wish for me to understand? I’m more than capable of doing so, but I need information first,”

“My... My name is Virgil...”

“Like the poet? Friend to Emperors, guide to the Underworld?”

“I- I mean, yeah?”

“Interesting. And what set you off, allowed your emotions to grow so strong that Papilion was able to manipulate them?”  
“I...” Virgil leaned back against the railing and the netting between it and the roof, “It’s stupid,”

“Emotions are, while not my area of expertise, not stupid, Virgil. They are a reaction to the world around you, and sometimes irrational- but not stupid,”

Virgil snorted, “You sound like Logan,”

“A friend of yours?” Noir tried to sound casual.

“Yeah... He said something to me about a- a thing I do. He probably wasn’t trying to be rude but...”

“If he is truly your friend, I imagine he will apologize,” he will. He most certainly will.

“Yeah... yeah you’re ri-”

But Virgil was suddenly thrust off of his feet by a burst of water, and Mariquita burst from the water, his suit now adorned with a brighter red and yellow.

Virgil came to his feet, hissing, “What the fu-”

“Mariquita!” Noir shouted, “What the hell are you doing!?”

“I’m Dragonbug, _mon chaton_!” said his partner, “And I’m dealing with the akuma!”

“I was trying to talk him do-”

But the wind picked up again, and Virgil turned to the two of them, “So this was just a distraction!?” he laughed, though there was no humour behind it, “I thought you actually might have _cared_!”

“Cared is a strong-”

Dragonbug grabbed Noir and dragged him behind a pillar, “Okay, so did you gather where the akuma is?”

Noir had a good idea, “He said he got in an argument with his friend about something. His power is coming from his hands, so I’d gather it’s the bracelet,”

“Wait why?”

“It has his name on it- Virgil, he said it was- and it is most likely a friendship bracelet,”

“Nice, gonna need you for this one, though, kitty,”

“I can’t-”

“You can’t move, yeah I know,” Dragonbug grinned, “That’s the point. You haven’t used your cataclysm yet, right?”

“Oh, no,”

“Sorry, kitty! I’ll make it up to you!” and Noir was shoved into the centre of the platform. The sound of the centuries-old metal creaking around them in response to wind it wasn’t designed for, the elevators wobbling, and Virgil’s continuing search for Logan.

At least he wouldn’t find him.

“Virgil!” Noir called out to him, and the akuma whipped his head around.

“ _You_ don’t get to call me that!”

“My apologies, Storm Cloud, I just want to talk,”

“Do you? Or is your friend going to-?”

“That was a miscommunication on his part, and I apologize for him,”

Virgil wandered towards him, “Is that so? And he can’t apologize for himself?”

“He’s not that great at that,”

Virgil laughed, “The great La Mariquita can’t apologize!? He really _is_ up his own ass, isn’t he?”

“He is no contortionist, at least not that I know of. How he would get his head into his anus is-”

“It’s-” Virgil pinched the bridge of his nose, “It’s a figure of speech,”

“Ah,”

On the railings above, Dragonbug gripped his yo-yo. He had one shot at this.

He threw it up and latched it onto a cross-rail, swinging down towards Virgil. His hand outstretched, and-

“ _Wind Dragon_!” there was a _fwoomph_ , and the bracelet was in Dragonbug’s hand, and then Virgil was screaming as he was pulled in a complete circle. He swung, but hit air as the bracelet came with the Miraculous holder. It tore, the beads clattering to the metal below.

Dragonbug returned to solid form, and watched as the akuma fluttered out from the beads. He tossed his yo-yo in it’s direction, “No more evil-doing for you!” he called after it with only the appropriate amount of drama. Releasing it, the butterfly now pure white, he pulled the ticket from his belt.

“ _Miraculous ladybug_!” he tossed it to the sky, and thousands of ladybugs made there way across the city, putting everything back as it was.

Noir rolled his shoulders, “That was mildly irritating,” he said, the two of them turning to Virgil, who was staring at them like he’d seen a ghost.

“What-” he managed, “what happened?”

“You were akumatized,” Dragonbug said, “but you’re okay now,”

Virgil reached down to fiddle with the bracelet.

“Right?” Noir asked.

“Yeah... Yeah I’m great,” he smiled.

There was a distinct beeping from Dragonbug’s direction, and he put his hand to his ear, “I gotta bug out-” Noir made a sound of disgust, “but I’ll see you later, _chaton_!” he held a hand out to his partner, who shook it.

Watching his partner disappear over the Seine, Noir turned to Virgil, “Would you like a ride home?”


	2. The Moments in Between

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

Logan blinked awake.

“ _Someone’s_ having a hissy fit,” Plagg informed him, happily continuing on with his camenbert.

Logan groaned, pulling himself from his bed- so warm and comfy...- and opened his door, leaning into the kitchen, “What?”

Roman turned towards him, the disdain in his expression figuratively visible from _space_ , and snapped, “This!” his arms flinging about the kitchen.

It was, truly, a mess. Logan had not exactly had the chance to clean up his mess from cooking the night before as an akuma had ripped through the entire building. At least repairs didn’t need to be done.

Logan sighed, “I apologize, I was a little bus-”

“Yo-ugh-o-a-ho-ah- you were _busy_? What, fighting the akuma yourself?”

Yes.

“No, of course not, you’re being ridiculous and childish-”

“ _I’m_ being childish!? You’re making excuses for _your_ fuck up-”

“I am simply explaining-”

“This is ridiculous!”

“Yes, it is!” Logan shoved past him, beginning to clean up his mess, “You did not need to wake me, for the record,”

Roman growled in response, storming into his room and slamming the door.

One day, Logan was going to kill him.

Plagg poked his head out from Logan’s shirt pocket, “You doin’ okay?”

“I am fine, Plagg,” he snapped, then sighed, “I- Sorry, I’m fine, I-”

“Yeah, I can tell,” the kwami flew towards the dishes in the sink, saying, “I also slam things when I’m ‘fine’,”

Logan smiled, “Thank you, Plagg,”

“It’s what I’m here for! That and my superior good looks!”

...

“... and he doesn’t do his dishes! ‘There was an akuma’? Yeah, _and_?”

Thomas snickered, “I think that’s a pretty valid excuse,”

“Was he _fighting_ it?” Roman retorted, “Didn’t think so!” he dug his fingers through his hair with one hand, and angrily sipped his latte with the other, “He just drives me _crazy_!”

Thomas smiled behind his coffee. If only Roman knew what a good team they made, “Maybe,” he set his drink down, “maybe you should just talk to him? Communication is key to a healthy relationship,”

“Thanks, _Patton_ , but I’ve tried that,”

Thomas shrugged, “Just giving you ideas,”

Speak of the devil and he shall appear, Patton swooped into the cafe, Virgil at his side. The latter found his way over to them, sitting down next to Roman.

“Hey,” he said, “Sorry I threw your bike 30 feet yesterday,” he said to Thomas, who almost laughed.

“Virge, you were akumatized. It’s fine!”

“Still, it wasn’t cool,”

Roman snorted, “It wasn’t cool of Papilion to akumatize you either, but you don’t see him here apologizing to _you_!”

“That’s.... true.... But still, I feel bad-”

Patton slid into the booth, sliding Virgil his drink, “Hey, now, Virgil, there’s no need to feel bad over what a super villain made you do!”

Virgil grumbled, “Jesus, you guys are like a broken record,”

“I mean,” Roman leaned forward, “if anyone should apologize to you, it’s Pocket Protector-”

“Roman-” Patton tired to interject, but Roman had started down this road and he wasn’t being stopped.

“I mean, you feel comfortable enough to talk about something you enjoy-”

“Ro, it’s fi-” Virgil started.

“- and all he says is,” Roman shifted to a nearly perfect impersonation of Logan, “‘Irrelevant to the task at hand,’” he threw his hands in the air, scoffing, then switching back to his normal voice, “I mean, could he be any ruder? I mean _no wonder_ he has no friends!”

Virgil pointed silently to behind Roman, who turned to the sight of Logan.

“I apologize,” Logan said, shifting the bag on his shoulder, “I’ll- erm- I’ll go,”

Patton and Thomas immediate attempted to follow, and Virgil huffed, “’no wonder he has any friends’?” he repeated.

“What, its true!”

“In your opinion. And even if it’s true, now he thinks you’re a douche- which you are being right now-”

“Virge!”

“-you are. And now he’s going to spread it around, and everyone’s going to hate you, and-”

Roman took Virgil’s hands, “Hey, let’s not panic, okay?”

Virgil laughed shakily, “You know who you’re talking to?”

Patton and Thomas came back to the table, both looking equally disappointed.

Uh-oh. Guilt incoming.

“That wasn’t very nice, Roman,” Patton said.

Oh, Jesus. The “Disappointed Dad” face.

Although one’s dad wasn’t usually one’s boyfriend. Hopefully.

“How was I supposed to know he was there?” Roman demanded, trying to ignore the guilt in his chest.

“That’s not the point,” Thomas grumbled.

Virgil sighed, “I would love to continue shaming Roman-” his aforementioned boyfriend made a very offended noise, “- but I have a class in 15 minutes. Thanks for the coffee, Pat,” he stepped out of the booth, kissed Roman and Patton goodbye, gave Thomas an awkward clap on the shoulder, and moved out of the cafe.

Thomas awkwardly put his hand on his shoulder, “One day I’ll actually have a conversation with him,”

...

“And how are you doing on this _lovely_ evening, _mon chaton_?”

Noir rolled his eyes, “I _was_ doing well,”

Mariquita made a very offended noise, “I’m just trying to lighten the mood!”

“There is not a lack of light, Mariquita. Paris is known as the ‘City of Light’ for a reason, even before the widespread use of electric lighti-”

“Okay, okay, Geek Squad, it was a figure of speech,”

“Ah,” Noir leaned on his staff, attempting to look casual, “Well, metaphors have never been my strong suit, even in English,”

“I noticed,” Mariquita made a noise like he’d been punched and said, “Sorry... That was rude, I just-” he dug his fingers through his hair, “My roommate is just such a _prick_ , and he got my boyfriend akumat-” was cut off by Noir raising a hand.

“That may be identifying information, Mariquita, and you know that we cannot know each other’s identities. However,” he thought of Roman’s particular hissy fit this morning, “I know exactly how you feel,”

“Oh, thank _god_!” Mariquita flopped down on the edge of the roof they were standing on, “I mean, is it so hard for a man to do dishes?”

“Or perhaps be aware of how, even if one’s own life is quite stressful, we must work together to keep this apartment clean?”

“I _know_! I mean he can’t even attempt to empathize with my situation-”

“- granted he does not know all of it-”

“- well, geez, I hope not, but that’s not the point-”

“- and he got your boyfriend akumatized? It is....” he shoved down the guilt about Virgil, “It is possible it may have not been on purpose,”

“Maybe...”

“Good evening, gentlemen!” came a voice from behind them.

The heroes turned to the sight of La Peon- his skin dark blue, the heavy eye shadow and his eyes an even darker one- and, of course, his collar was incredibly low. “Slutty”, as Roman would no doubt put it.

Not that such a thing was shameful. Creating sentimonsters from people’s negative emotions, however?

“What do you want?” Mariquita asked, “We’re in the middle of a gossip session here,”

“Oh?” La Peon put the back of his hand against his forehead, leaning back dramatically, “I have ripped a dramatic, emotional, _romantic_ moment from your fingerti-”

“I already have boyfriends, as I’ve told you several-”

“And what’s one more?”

“Without the other’s consent? That’s called cheating,”

“True, true...” La Peon almost looked pensive for a moment, then turned back to them, his ridiculous moustache glinting in the soft light of Paris, “But, I simply come bearing a message,” Was the moustache part of the transformation, or did he have it in civilian form, too?

“And what’s that?” Mariquita asked, clearly not interested in the conversation.

“Oh, nothing big, just uh,” he cleared his throat dramatically, “Give me your Miraculouses, or this will get ugly!” he smiled at them, and Noir tried not to notice the fact that Peon had most likely not brushed his teeth in _several_ days.

“Oh, Jesus,” Mariquita grumbled, “Look, you can ask as politely as you want, we’re not going to-”

But with unnatural speed, La Peon closed the space between them, and grabbed Mariquita by the collar of his jacket, and throwing them over the edge.

“Shit!” Noir shrieked, the yo-yo grabbing onto the storm drain in front of him. He jumped down after them, watching them hit the ground and roll into the street, the yo-yo releasing the storm drain and clattering to the ground.

Noir began ushering people away from the ridiculous tussle going on in the middle of the street. One person, clearly a tourist, shrieked at him in English, “What in God’s name is going on?”

Noir hissed back, “Just get out of here!”

“No, I demand-”

“Listen, lady, you’re putting yourself in danger here,”

La Peon was on his feet now, wiping blood from his lip, “Just take a nap, now, little bug,”

Noir thrust his staff out, and it grew several feet, knocking La Peon back several feet, “Mariquita, I would suggest getting on your feet!”

“Wow, I didn’t think of that!” snapped his partner, who was, begrudgingly, doing as he was told, running after the villain.

Noir turned back to the English lady that he was still holding at arms length, “Google it,” he snapped, taking off after the others.

He found Mariquita standing on the bank of the Seine, looking particularly confused, “He disappeared,”

“You mean you lost his location?”

“Yeah... Weird, I swear I just saw him,”

20 feet down river, under a bridge, Remus de Laurens shoved his miraculous in his pocket.


	3. Pieces Moving Forward, Ever Slowly

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me: is sick  
> my brain, realizing i can write now: its free real estate

Remus leaned against the brick walls that lined the Seine. He could already hear Dee’s mothering- “Did you really just run out to be petty?”. Yes, yes he did.- and was imagining how _romantic_ it would be when he dropped into his partner’s arms, hacking up blood because he decided to use a broken miraculous when his chest started to contract.

“Are you okay, Master?” Duusu asked, floating closer to their owner. But Remus was already starting to feel the weight of the world start to come down around his shoulders, and he could only motion for the kwami to hide in his jacket.

His legs shook, and he fumbled to cover his mouth as he started to cough. He slid down the wall and pulled his jacket closer, struggling to find the Kleenexes in his pockets. To their credit, Duusu was trying to help, trying to get them in between his fingers but only half succeeding because their little kwami head kept getting in the way and-

“Are you alright, sir?”

Ah, of course.

Noir was looking at him in that particularly disinterested way he looked at everyone. It may just be the green eyes talking but he always looked like his mind was a million miles away from the conversation, like he was trying to think 300 steps ahead of everyone else.

And it was _obnoxious_. Was it so much to ask to live in the moment? Must one be civilized? Can one simply not be huddled against the banks of the Seine, and hack blood into their hands?

“ ‘m fine-” Remus tried to say, but blood came out of his mouth and he had to cough into the sleeve of his jacket. He pulled back from it, and spent a moment examining it.

Gross, he decided.

“You do not appear fine,” the other Miraculous holder took a hesitant step closer, “Do you need a hospita-”

“ ** _No!_** ” Remus screeched, perhaps a bit _too_ loud, because La Mariquita came running.

“What’s goi-” he looked at Remus, pathetically huddled against the riverside with his own blood all over his face and whispered, “Oh, god,”

He almost sounded like he cared.

But of course he didn’t, because folks like him that go off on their dramatic little tirade of “protecting Paris” didn’t actually care what he and Dee were trying to achieve. He hadn’t seen Roman’s face as the doctors told them that there was nothing they could do, there’d been too much damage.

 _La Mariquita_ hadn’t held his brother as he’d sobbed in the hallway of the private hospital, the Fancy Rich Folks who _knew_ who’s sons they were, who didn’t _care_ that they’d just lost their mothers, who didn’t _care_ as Remus swore to him that he’d do everything in his power to make it okay again.

Who didn’t care that it wasn’t.

So, forgive him if a snarl came out of his mouth at the Oh-So-Important son of a bitch in front of him, “I said, I’m fine,” he tried to pull himself to his feet, failed, and almost stumbled right into the river.

Noir held him by the arm and said, “You clearly are not. If you do not wish to go to a hospital, then perhaps you can allow us to take you home?”

Like he wanted these sons of bitches knowing where he lived.

“Remus!” came a frantic call and he saw Dee standing on the bridge above them, “What the hell are you doing?”

God he looked beautiful.

Maybe it was just the post-transformation dizziness talking, but Dee always managed to look stunning in the low light of the riverside. He’d long since given up trying to keep his hair dyed, so despite the brown tips, his natural blonde shone like a halo. The scar on his face was something folks often jumped at, surprised that the heir to the de Villany fortune was so.... Not Normal.

But that was one more thing Remus loved about him.

That and his willingness to go along with his batshit plans.

“I’m just-” Remus motioned to the heroes beside him, “-just vibin’,”

“Vibing?” Dee repeated, deadpan, “Yeah, I’m sure of that. Guys, can you just bring my dumbass boyfriend up here before he kills himself?”

“ _Boyfriend_?” repeated Mariquita as if Dee had just kicked a puppy right in front of him.

“Yeah, boyfriend. Some people are gay, polka-dots, get over it,”

“Polka-dots!?” Mariquita spluttered.

“Yes, you have 2 boyfriends, La Mariquita, what on Earth are you so upset about?”

“I- I’m not!”

“You clearly are,”

“What makes you think I’m upset-”

“Your tone, for one. Do you know this man?”

“My to-OH- _no_! _What_? What makes you think that-”

Remus was grateful when his knees gave out and he dropped like a sack of hammers.

He couldn’t help but laugh, which of course became mixed with coughing, and he said, “You know, polka-dots-”

“That is _not_ sticking-”

“I think you two should just get in a room, fuck, and get it over with!”

“You’re-” Mariquita looked perfectly uncomfortable as he picked Remus up, holding him bridal style, “You’re delirious with blood loss,”

“Ah, now you’d know if that happ- _AH_!”

For just a moment, they were weightless, being thrown up a story and a half as Mariquita effortlessly brought them up to Dee. He nervously set Remus down on his feet- the latter noticing with a bit of satisfaction that the collar of his jacket was torn. Ha! Take that, bitch!- and Dee scrambled over to them.

He took Remus’ face in his hands and said, “You do look like shit, darling. Let’s get you home,”

“Yeah...” Not wanting to be around those fuckwits any longer he leaned into Dee, “’m tired...”

Dee chuckled, “I imagine so,” he motioned a ‘thanks’ to the super heroes and led Remus to the car.

The second Dee was in the driver’s seat, Nooroo and Duusu were in the back, pulling apart the several day old box of doughnuts that they hadn’t finished.

Dee chuckled, “Just don’t over-indulge yourself, guys,”

“Wouldn’t dream of it!” was what Remus assumed Nooroo was trying to say, but instead it came out as “wubbnt dweab ob it!’ which was cute.

“How’d you know where I was?” Remus asked after a few minutes of silence.

“Had the news on in the background,” Dee replied, “I know you’re stressed about the whole brunch with Roman thing-”

“I am not ‘stressed’ about it! Why would I have any reason to be-”

“But that’s not an excuse. Until we get our hands on the cipher for this manuscript, you can’t fight with that Miraculous,”

Remus glared out the window. He hated when he was right.

“Okay, so the next time I want to punch their faces in can I use yours?”

Dee chuckled, and looked up in the rear-view mirror, “What do you think, Nooroo?”

“Nope,” the kwami said succinctly.

“Jury’s in,” Dee said with a shrug.

“What!?” Remus demanded, “Look, Mr Law Student-” Dee laughed, “- I may not know what a ‘juhree’ is, but I do know that Nooroo has never served juhree duty in his _life_ -”

“Neither have you!”

“- and therefor, I hope you will find me not guilty,”

“Ah, well,” Dee sighed as he pulled the car up to the garage gate, “I was hoping we could make some sort of _arrangement_? I mean, for a guilty man to walk free he’d need-” he turned to Remus and put his hand on the side of his face. It was just briefly, but the look in his eyes made it very clear what he was suggesting, “-collateral?”

Within the next 3 minutes, Remus was _also_ in the driver’s seat, and his tongue was down Dee’s throat.

So, not such a bad way to end the night, in his opinion.

...

“ _Boyfriend_...?” Roman repeated to himself for the third time as he scrolled through Remus’ Instagram.

It was very obvious, and very clear, that his brother and _Julius Augustus fucking de Villany_ were a couple.

It wasn’t so much that Roman was angry- they were adults, who cares- it was just that.....

Okay, so he was angry.

Angry that his brother didn’t tell him, angry that he was still talking to that son of a bitch, angry that de Villany was probably strutting around his house- his mothers’ house- and like.....

And fucking his brother????

And on that note, Tikki decided to intervene, “Are you alright, Roman?”

“No,”

“I figured,” the kwami settled herself down on his phone, forcing him to ignore what he was looking at, “Why does this have you so upset?”

Roman sighed, “Ever since our moms died, I didn’t do the best at keeping in touch, I get it, but...” he glared at the wall behind his kwami, “We just.... We don’t talk anymore,” he dug his fingers through his hair, “I know i talk a lot of shit about Logan but.... But I’d rather be here than in that house,”

“Why?”

“It’s stupid....”

Tikki put her hand on her friend’s, “If you’re feeling something, Roman, then it’s not stupid,”

Roman gave a breathy laugh, “I guess so.... I just... Sometimes, when everything is quiet- when the streets are nearly empty because no one comes this close to the river but tourists and artists, and the old oil lamps flicker on outside I can almost hear them,”

“Your moms?”

“Yeah.... It’s stupid, cause I know that I can’t.... I was at the funeral, I _know_....” he sniffled, “But it’s just little things- mom’s favourite song, momma up at 2 am again making hot cocoa to help her sleep...” he started crying, because of course he did. He always did when he talked about this, “And- and other times it’s just so _empty_... It’s like a mausoleum full of momma’s paintings and mom’s awards and- and- and all I can hear is how the air conditioning moves through it and Remus snoring even though he’s across the hall and the computer he left on in his room is so loud because he’s the only other life there, and-” he sobbed, “I’m sorry, Tikki, you didn’t ask about that...”

“It’s part of why you’re upset, and I’m here for you,” she smiled at him, and Roman was suddenly crying for another reason- because he ran into a nice guy at an audition 6 months ago only to be introduced to him by a kwami 4 months later. Thomas had seen something in him that Roman still couldn’t find within himself, and it was something that Tikki was seeing right now, even as he was sobbing over things that weren’t really relevant.

She was a good friend.

Thomas was a good friend.

Before they’d been upgraded to the status of boyfriends, Virgil and Patton had been as well. (They still were, but Roman got to smooch them sometimes, so that was a plus.)

He just pulled his kwami up to his face and gave her a little hug.

“Thank you, Tikki,”

“No problem. And you don’t have to talk about things until you’re ready,”

“I know,” he frowned at his phone, at the picture of Remus and Juliu- _Dee_ , “So, I was invited over for brunch tomorrow...”


	4. Brunch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> still sick  
> so chapter

“This absolutely _isn’t_ going to be a disaster,” Dee drawled from his spot on the counter.

“It’ll be fine!” Remus assured him, lunging across the room to flip his pancakes, “ _Shit_!”

Duusu was trying their best to help- as always- and was diligently holding the spatula, attempting to maneuver it to flip the pancake themselves, only succeeding in flinging it right into the face of their owner.

Remus yelped several curse words as his momentum was thrown off and he stumbled back into the island.

Dee just picked up his tea bag, dipped it in and out of the water a few times, put it to his lips and smiled, “I told you so,”

“I can do this!” Remus snapped, “And I really do appreciate it, Duusu, but, like...”

The aforementioned kwami was, now, sobbing as they attempted to wipe the batter off of Remus’ face, muttering how sorry they were.

“Ah, geez, Duusu, it’s alright...”

Nooroo hovered up to his master’s shoulder, happily chewing on a chocolate chip he’d not-so-discreetly stolen from the bag, “This _is_ going to be a disaster, isn’t it?”

Dee chuckled, “Maybe,” he tilted his head as his boyfriend gave Duusu the job of “putting dirty things in the sink BUT ONLY WHEN I TELL YOU TO!!”, “Well...” he smiled at his kwami, “Hopefully not,”

“Are you sure you don’t want our help, Remus?” Nooroo asked, causing Remus to make several offended noises.

“I’ve got this! Don’t worry! I’m gonna make a brunch that’ll knock Roman’s socks right off!”

“And his feet!” Duusu added, tears gone now that they could help.

“Yes!” There was a _bit_ too much enthusiasm there, but they were on this metaphor and now they weren’t stopping, “And his entire legs, too!”

“There’ll be blood everywhere!”

“Like a painting!”

“A _pretty_ painting!”

Dee chuckled, “Hey, dumbasses! Your pancakes are burning!”

...

“I’m sorry- I just thought you hated me?”

Roman ran last night’s conversation with Tikki in his head over again.

 _Just give him a chance!_ she’d said, and Roman had scoffed, but, like... Here he was!

“I don’t hate you, Dr Dork-Little,” Roman responded, “You just drive me up the fucking wall sometimes-”

“You do not have a vehicle, Roman, and even if you did-”

“It’s a figure of speech, bud,”

“Oh,” Logan fiddled with his glasses, “You meant colloquially, I... I understand,”

“Alright, good,” Roman tapped the edge of the table several times, “So, uh, do you want to come?”

“I suppose it couldn’t hurt,”

“Oh, so you don’t take that one literally,”

Logan had guessed that Roman had been exaggerating when he’d said that his mothers had been, quote, “Absolutely fuckin’ loaded, Newtonian Nerd,”- which had been one of his least creative nicknames. The building before them had more than certainly had work on it recently, but the architecture was definitely Imperial in nature- refurbished during Napoleon's reign or shortly thereafter- and was larger than any building Logan had ever been in that wasn’t a government or learning institution, and was a pale brown colour that would make one think it was just a government building- or even a museum, the Musée d'Orsay and Louvre were just down the street.

Well, just down the river.

“Do you know the origins of this building?” Logan found himself asking.

Roman shrugged as they made their way up to the gate, “Not entirely. Mom inherited it after her dad died, though. Her family was old Imperial money,”

“Was there not..... A whole revolution to stop that from happening?”

Roman snorted, “There was, like, 3, technically, but yeah. Power tends to stay in the hands of the powerful, though,”

“That is.... True....”

“Depressing, but yeah,” then his face scrunched up into something Logan couldn’t identify, “I mean, it’s pretty rich for me to say that, I know, but that doesn’t mean I like it,”

Logan nodded, “It is good that you recognize that privilege, though,” he frowned, “Is that why you chose to live in student housing?”

Roman grit his teeth, “Among other things,”

“Ah,” Logan nodded, “I did not mean to pry,”

“You didn’t, it’s alright, it’s just-” he reached up and pushed the doorbell, “Ugh, you’ll see,”

Logan actually jumped back as a security camera atop the gate turned to them.

“Hi Roman!” came a voice from the speaker, “You brought a friend? Didn’t know ya had those!”

Roman snorted, “Well, I do-”

“Friend is a strong word-” Logan attempted to say.

“- and I’m hurt you didn’t notice! Just let us in, please!”

“Oooh, awe you a big boy now, Wowman?”

“Don’t you fucking uwu at me, Mr, I will shatter you into a million pieces,”

Despite the threat, the doors of the gate swung open, the camera slunk back into it’s hiding spot, and Roman led his roommate up to the doors.

It swung open to reveal a young man, slightly shorter than Logan, with pale blonde hair. Along the left side of his face was thick scar tissue- a burn scar, if Logan was not mistaken- and his eyes were dark brown, though the left one was visibly scarred, as well.

 _Most likely the same injury_ , Logan assumed.

He was also the same man from the night before, who had taken a clearly intoxicated- and injured- boyfriend home after Noir found him.

“Hey,” was all he said.

“Salutations,” was Logan’s response.

“My name’s Dee,”

“Logan. I am Roman’s roommate,”

“I’m Remus’ boyfriend, though, uh,” he shot a smile Roman’s way, “I know this one too, sadly,”

Roman made some very offended noises, “Excuse you? I am the _good_ twin!”

“Yeah that’s true!” came a shout from somewhere in the background. Logan tried to hide his concern- if Remus _was_ the man from last night, he aught to be in bed, or at the least not having family over.

Of course, the man who slid into the entrance hall in socks, jeans, and a flour-covered t-shirt was the man from last night. And he slid right through the room and hit the banister that led upstairs.

Roman made a noise like he’d been shot, himself, and scrambled to his brother’s side, “Good god, are you trying to kill yourself?”

Remus shrugged, “Maybe, you’d never know!”

“Remus, that’s not funny!”

The brothers immediately began bickering and Dee sighed. He hovered at Logan’s side, “Have we met?” he asked.

“No, I do not believe so,” Logan frowned. You’d think that scar would immediately remind him of who he was thinking of, but there was only the lingering feeling of Dee being..... Familiar. And not just because he’d seen him last night- he’d felt the same thing then. Like they’d met before, under different circumstances, with different faces, with different lives....

Okay, that was getting ridiculous. And illogical.

Roman had helped his brother to his feet, who was coughing into his elbow, “’m fine, Ro,” he assured his brother, but the sight of Remus huddled at the edge of the river, coughing blood into his hands shot to Logan’s mind and he stepped forward, feigning ignorance.

“Are you certain? You seem to be shaking, perhaps you should sit,”

Remus presumably met Dee’s eyes from just behind Logan and he nodded, almost seeming like a guilty child, “Yeah.... Yeah maybe that’s.... Yeah,”

Roman set him down on the steps. He almost looked unsure of what to do in his own home. “You, uh, you want me to finish anything for you?”

“No, no I can do it,” Dee shot Roman a particularly exhausted look.

As Remus scrambled back into the kitchen, Logan turned to his roommate, and his roommate’s brother’s boyfriend, both or whom were shooting each other glares.

“So, was anyone going to tell me that you live here, now?” Roman snipped, and Dee scoffed.

“You don’t fucking _live_ here, anymore, Roman, I don’t see how it-”

“Listen, William Snake-spere-”

“Is that supposed to be an insult?”

“- I just like to know what’s going on, you know?”

“Amazing,” Dee examined his nails- painted black, Logan noted- “If you even sent a text message-”

“I’ve been busy, I’m sorry!”

“- you’d kno- no, don’t fucking apologize to _me_ -”

“Communication is a two way fucking bri-”

“And why is it on Remus to step up? _You_ fucking left-”

“I don’t have to fucking explain myself to _you_ -!”

Logan cleared his throat, motioning to Remus. He was leaning against the doorway to the dining room- Logan still couldn’t get his head around how big this place was- giving the group a Cheshire grin. He was attempting to look cool, but Logan could see the way his hands were shaking in his pockets, and the way his excitement didn’t _quite_ reach his eyes.

“As much as I love watching you two bicker, I didn’t slave for hours for it to go cold,”

“Wait,” Roman paused, “You _made_ it?”

“Well, yeah!”

“And you didn’t poison it?”

“Alas, no,” Remus pushed off from the wall, “That would’ve been a good idea, though, wouldn’t it? Just kill you off under the guise of a friendly brunch and take your share of the inheritance?”

Roman shook his head, but there was no fond smile on his face.

A touch subject, their mothers, it seemed.

The mysterious deaths of Angélique and Celeste de Laurens had been worldwide news, at least to those within the circles of lawyers and judges, as Logan’s own parents were. “A horrible accident” the press had called it. Their driver had testified that he’d been assaulted by someone in yellow, that he’d been unable to move, even as they shot straight into the Metro.

There had been survivors, but the passengers had not been among them.

“That’s not funny,” was all Roman grumbled as he walked past his brother, who’s wide smile fell immediately.

“I was just- it was just-” Remus fumbled for his words before turning to face his brother, “Sorry,”

“It’s alright just- how many times do I have to tell you I don’t want to talk about-”

“ _You_ brought it up!”

“I didn’t, you just shot to-”

“I don’t know how the hell you intend to get over this if you don’t-”

“ _Get over it_!?” Roman repeated, fire in his eyes, “ _ **Get over it!?**_ How the hell do you expect me to get over-”

“It was a year ago, Roman, you need to be able to liv-”

“Some of us actually have _emotions_!”

“You have _no_ idea what I’m going through-”

Where had Dee disappeared to?

“I _want_ to!” Roman urged his brother, “I want to kno-” his voice faltered, “Remus.” his anger had been replaced with fear, “We can have this argument later, I just need you to-”

Logan had seen it too, now. An akuma fluttered into the room, hovering between the two brothers as if it was attempting to decide.

He attempted to step closer to Remus, trying to put himself between them, “I admit that I don’t understand this situation fully-”

“ _No_ ,” Remus snapped, “you don’t so stay out of it!” he raised his hand to slam it onto the table, and as it was in the air, the akuma fluttered right into his bracelet.

“Hello, Intrusivity,” Papilion drawled, “I'm giving you the power to make everyone hear you- and _listen_." he paused, then added,"And I am _terribly_ sorry about this, darling, but I couldn’t stand you getting so upset. I think this is a far better way to get this anger out, don’t you?”

“ _Oui_ , Papilion, I do,”

Papilion smiled, “Good. You know what you have to do."


	5. Intrusivity I

Watching someone become akumatized was never easy, and it was worse when it was your brother.

Roman could only stumble backwards as his brother’s hand hovered in the air, the words “ _Oui_ , Papilion,” came through his lips, and darkness spread across his body.

“Remus-!” but Logan was already grabbing Roman by the waist and throwing him over his shoulder- oh, _wow_ he was strong- and running from the building.

 _ **Stop!**_ came Remus’ voice from behind them, and Logan’s feet stopped moving like they’d suddenly turned to stone. For a moment, Roman stopped breathing.

The creature that came to a stop beside them was not Remus, but whatever Papilion had twisted him into. His skin was green and his hair was greener, and 8 thick slimy _tentacles_ had sprouted from his back. Dressed in black with a green sash, Remus sauntered around them, and pulled his brother from Logan’s grip.

 _ **Everything’s gonna be okay, Ro,**_ Remus said, and Roman could do nothing but believe him, _**How about you stick around with me until Mariquita and Noir show up?**_

“Or,” Logan offered, “Or you could leave him here?”

Remus snorted, _**Why would I do that?**_

“This is bound to become a fight, yes? Roman is hardly invulnerable, or as close to it as Mariquita and Noir appear to be- and perhaps you are,”

Remus frowned, _**Nah.**_

And Roman was thrown over his brother’s shoulder, and in a blur they were in the streets, barrelling down the riverside.

“Remus!” he managed to splutter, “I don’t know what he off-”

_**I’m not Remus anymore, brother! I’m Intrusivity!** _

“O-okay, Intrusivity, well I don’t know what he offered you, but it can’t be worth it!”

Remus- Intrusivity- sneered, _**What he’s offering, Roman, is more than worth it.**_

Roman swallowed, “But Noir a-”

Intrusivity screeched to a halt. Roman barley managed to get his bearings- street level of the Louvre, the pyramid was right there- before his brother had shot a tentacle across the clearing and torn a concrete pillar straight out of the sidewalk. He slammed it down in front of him, sat Roman there, and wrapped those gross tentacles around him.

Also, he told him to _**Stay.**_ which kind of motivated him to stay right there.

Intrusivity cleared his throat, and turned to the crowd of people who were huddled around the edges of the square, snapping photos and taking videos. Most of these poor folks were tourists, clearly, and were horrified by what they were seeing.

 _ **Bonjour, Paris!**_ When he spoke this time, it was like standing in the centre of a hurricane. Sound came from his mouth, sure, but it was also _everywhere_ \- in Roman’s chest, his head, his gut, bouncing off the stone buildings around them and shooting through the alleyways like cold winter winds, _**My name is Intrusivity! And I would just like to have a word with you all!**_ He turned to his brother and for a moment, Roman almost thought he looked sad. Scared, even. But then he smiled that horrible smile- the one that wasn’t his own. The one that looked like it had been carved into his face.

The one that looked like a monster’s.

 _ **But first things first! La Mariquita! Noir! Bring me your miraculouses and no one gets hurt!**_ Roman already felt his body trying to fight- to pull his arms out so he could take the earrings off, to hand them to his brother. But Intrusivity tightened the grip of his tentacles and sneered at him, **Relax, Roman.** And so he did.

There were shouts from the crowd- someone was stumbling through it. And for a moment, Roman was terrified that he was going to see Noir and was preparing some sort of frantic speech when Logan broke through.

His brow was covered in a thin sheen of sweat, and his fists were presumably tightened if the tension in his shoulders were anything to go by. His hands were shoved in the pockets of his blazer and his hair was a mess.

He looked furious.

“Let him go, Intrusivity,” was all he said.

“Logan, what the hell are you doing!?” Roman demanded, but his brother just sauntered forward.

 _ **Interesting.**_ he said, _**It was a nice try, Specks, but I wasn’t asking for you. Mariquita! Noir! Don’t make this harder than it has to be!**_

Roman’s body was screaming- on the one hand, he was fighting against his arms, straining to keep them straight. On the other, his arms were held tightly in place by Remus, which hurt quite a bit. Roman leaned forward and curled his legs up, desperate to keep his arms straight.

He managed to catch sight of Logan, who was standing firm, his hands in his pockets, looking ready to murder.

Ready to murder for _him_. For _Roman_.

Huh.

“They are not falling for whatever this is, Intrusivity,” Logan snapped, “That much is clear,”

“Yeah!” Roman was getting a little desperate, the pain was becoming a lot, “I mean-” he made a noise of pain, and Intrusivity whirled around, looking scared.

 _ **Are- are you hurt!?**_ he spluttered, _**I don’t want to hurt him!**_ That last part appeared to be directed towards Papilion. If he gave a response, Intrusivity didn’t seem too comforted by it.

He turned back to Roman, _**Roman, please! Stop hurting!**_

Roman took a shaky breath as his body went numb, ignoring the pain, “Okay,” he said, sitting up straight.

_**Okay?** _

“Okay,”

 **Good. Now then!** Intrusivity turned on his heel back to Logan, **Get out of here, Specks. I’m not asking for you.**

Logan stumbled backwards, his legs pulling him back into the crowd. As he disappeared, Roman could only hope that his partner would show up soon.

Logan’s legs finally stopped him at the river’s edge. Most were following the sound of Intrusivity, and Logan was quite grateful for that.

Plagg flew out from his pockets, “If you transform and he calls for you again-!”

“I know, Plagg, I know. But Mariquita appears to be fighting this as well...”

“I, uh...” Plagg was looking behind his holder, “I wouldn’t say that...”

“What are you-?” Logan turned his head, seeing Mariquita’s kwami soaring towards them.

“You’re Noir, right?” she asked.

“I- I am, yes, where is-”

“Mariquita’s- uh- a little bit held up at the moment. Family emergency,”

“Ah,” Logan nodded, “Well, what would you suggest? Do you have his miraculous?”

Plagg laughed a little bit, “I don’t think you’d want to be using both of our miraculouses at once, Lo,”

Logan frowned, “I fail to see the downside. I would have both a weapon and power at my disposal that I am familiar with, as well as the ability to purify akumas,”

“It’s a bit more complicated than that,” Mariquita’s kwami said, almost sounding nervous, “There’s only so much that I can tell you but-” her eyes lit up, “That’s it!”

“What is?” Logan asked, and the kwami started down the river, motioning for him to follow.

“I know someone who can help!”

Logan stared at the apartment door, “Tikki, are you-” but she just soared straight through the door, “Oh-”

There was a rustling on the other side, and Logan readied himself. He wasn’t quite sure what to expect of the enigmatic “Guardian”. Mariquita had mentioned him on occasion, but Logan suspected the only reason they were not yet acquainted was due to his living situation.

Who was the _current_ situation.

Oh, Roman. He was probably terrified. For all his boisterous talk, he was quite an emotional man. Not that that was a bad thing- Logan simply was not.

The idea of being kidnapped by your akumatized brother.....

Not a nice one.

The door opened, and Thomas Sanders smiled at him, “Hey, Logan, c’mon in,”

Logan frowned, “Hello, Thomas, I- uh-”

“Tikki brought you to the right spot, bud, don’t worry,”

Oh.

_Oh._

Thomas motioned for Logan to come in, “I don’t bi-”

Suddenly, Intrusivity’s voice rang through their heads, _**Noir! Mariquita~!**_ he sang, _**I’m wai-ting~!**_

Thomas grabbed Logan’s arm as his body started to attempt to leave, “Do your best not to listen to him. I’d wager Papilion gave him the ability to control with his voice,”

“That does appear to be the case,” Logan agreed, allowing Thomas to lead him into the apartment.

It was quite a quaint living space, even for one man- and another kwami, a green one resembling a turtle, by the looks of it- it was small. There was a pull-out couch, a small kitchen, a television currently showing the live coverage of the akuma situation, a coffee table. Logan presumed the door on the other side of the room led to a hallway- or perhaps even just the bathroom. The walls were covered in posters of Broadway productions, American television shows, and Disney productions, as well as several photos of people Logan didn’t recognize- he’d say family, but they didn’t quite look like it.... Not that that was a defining factor, of course.

Thomas kneeled in front of the couch and pulled out a hat box, “So, here’s the deal- I can let you borrow a miraculous or two, you either merge it with Plagg, or you lend them to someone that you trust in order to assist you,”

Logan nodded, “I understand,”

“And when I say lend, I mean lend. A one time thing, at most. I need them back afterwards, until we know that we can trust them completely,”

“Of course,”

“And Logan?”

“Yes?”

“Good luck,”


	6. Intrusivity II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whoops its 4000 words

Patton kept his back pressed against the wall. Virgil was pressed against him, his head buried in Patton’s shoulder in an attempt to block out the sound of Intrusivity’s voice. Of course, it wouldn’t work, but Patton kept his arms around his boyfriend in an attempt to comfort him nonetheless.

Geez, how long had it been since they’d talked to Remus? Since before Celeste and Angélique died, for certain. What a reunion it was appearing to be.

“This is _the_ nightmare scenario,” Virgil hissed for the 3rd time.

“It’ll be alright, Virge,” Patton assured him, kissing him on the forehead, “La Mariquita and Noir will fix this,”

“I don’t know why we trust two people to fix all of our problems. What happens if they’re sleeping? If they’re sick? If they break a bone, or get appendicitis-”

“That’s pretty specific, kiddo,”

“- or they have a heart attack, or die and no one finds their body-”

“Virgil,” Patton pulled back and put his hands on the sides of Virgil’s face, “Deep, slow breaths,”

“But-!”

“Just look at me,” Patton instructed, “and breathe,”

Virgil managed to do what he was told, even with Intrusivity’s loud, off-key (purposefully, probably, considering Remus) rendition of _All Star_ blared through their skulls, and calmed down a bit, leaning back into Patton’s arms, still shaking.

“Thanks, Pat,”  
“No problem,” he ran his fingers through Virgil’s dark locks. He’d bought bleach to dye it purple last night. In fact, he’d been planning to do it today until Intrusivity’s command had called them into the streets. They’d managed to stay secluded for their fear of crowds, but if what they were hearing was anything to go by, Roman was in danger.

This _may_ actually be the nightmare scenario.

“Hopefully Princey doesn’t go and die on us,” Virgil attempted to joke.

“Remus won’t do that,” Patton assured him, still staring at the wall on the other side of the alleyway.

“Papilion might,” Virgil mused, “We don’t know this guy’s limits- or, this person- I shouldn’t assume whether they’re a dude, I guess... Point is, we don’t know,” his hands shook, “When they get inside your head, Pat, you’ll... You’ll do anything they ask, anything to get those miraculouses,”

“Yeah but-”

“Patton,” Virgil looked up at his partner now, “You’d do _anything_ ,”

This terrifying little conversation was interrupted by two solid boots hitting the ground beside them. They belonged to the black cat superhero- Noir.

Patton really didn’t understand the point of the animal themes. He assumed it had to do with the “miraculouses”- Virgil had been a little mystified by it after Noir had dropped him off the other day, amazed that all that power came from some earrings and a ring- but Noir had somehow managed to make it look practical, especially compared to his partner’s eccentricities.

Also, he was terrifying.

Maybe it was just the way those green eyes- selcra included- made him look so alien... Despite Virgil’s insistence that their power came from jewellery, that didn’t mean he wasn’t human underneath the mask.

“H-hi!” Patton managed to say, “You alright, there, bud?”

Noir pressed two fingers against the bridge of his nose, “I am fine, though I appreciate the sentiment,” he shook his head and straightened, “In fact, I’ve been looking for the two of you,”

Virgil made a noise somewhere between confusion and fear, “What? Why?”

“The man Intrusivity has captured is your boyfriend, yes?” Noir motioned towards Virgil, “Virgil was quite worried about him as I returned him home the other day,”

Virgil blushed, “I mean- I was- I-”

Patton smiled, “Aww, you talk about us?”

“Well of course I do! I love you! Both of you!”

Noir cleared his throat, “You are still worried about him, yes?”

Patton nodded vigorously, “Yeah, yeah of course we are!”

“Then I offer you the chance to help. My partner is- uh- _indisposed_ at the moment, and I require assistance,”

Virgil held his hands up in defence, “Look, I’m all for making sure Doctor Do-the-Most is alright, but we don’t have superpowers, fam,”

Noir nodded, “That is true,” he held out two small boxes, “However, I can offer that, as well,”

Patton immediately started shaking.

Were these miraculouses? There were more than two? That made sense, seeing how Mariquita had become Dragonbug when Virgil was akumatized, but...

“Patton Dufour, I offer you the Miraculous of the Bee, utilizing the Power of Subjugation,” Noir turned to Virgil, “and Virgil Lapointe, I offer you the Miraculous of the Snake, utilizing the Power of Intuition. Once this is done, you will return the miraculouses to me, alright?”

Patton nodded and hesitantly took the box handed to him, and Virgil did the same. He opened it up and-

“ _Ah_!” Patton yelped, accidentally throwing the box in surprise as a creature came flying out of it. Noir easily caught it, and was about to say something before the creature _spoke_.

“Greetings, My Queen!” it said, bowing dramatically.

Patton stared, “Uh- hi! I’m not- uh- I mean, I don’t-”

The creature smiled at him, “I apologize for my bluntness. I am Pollen, kwami of subjugation! How may I serve you?”

Noir stepped forward, “Pollen, we don’t have much time. Just let them know how to transform. I’ll distract Intrusivity, just make sure you’re there,”

Patton nodded, “Yes, sir!”

Noir actually smiled, “There’s no need for that, just call me Noir,”

“You got it!”

As the senior superhero bounded away over the rooftops, Virgil opened his box. The creature inside- kwami- introduced himself as Sass, and was also quite polite.

“Patton, you said your name was?” Pollen asked, “Well, you just put that pretty little clip in your hair, and to transform, all you need to say is ‘Pollen, buzz on!’”

The pin slid into his curls easily, “Like that?”

“Perfect! Whenever you are ready, My Queen,”

“Alright then! Pollen, buzz on!”

Roman was still only slightly panicking.

Honestly he was prepared for this afternoon to be a shit show, but this wasn’t what he’d imagined.

“Intrusivity?” he asked, the numbness in his body was now starting to fade, “What did he offer you?”

Intrusivity turned to his brother, quirking an eyebrow, _**What?**_

“Papilion. What did he offer you? You said it was worth anything,”

His brother looked sad. Then scared. Then excited, _**Something wonderful.**_

“That’s not- Re, that’s not exactly specifi-,”

“I apologize for my tardiness,” Noir stepped towards the twins, his hands clasped behind his back, “I was a bit busy, and your invitation was quite unexpected,”

Roman grinned, “Did you just make a _joke_?”

Noir blinked at him. Roman realized with a start that _Roman_ and Noir had never interacted.

Whoops.

“I would never joke, Monsieur de Laurens,”

Ah, there it is.

Intrusivity scoffed, _**Are you here to make it easier, Kitty Cat?**_

“I wouldn’t say that,” Noir gave that half-smile of his, and in a breath his staff was slamming into Intrusivity’s chest, and Roman was, by means of the tentacles wrapped around him being shoved backwards, ripped from his brother’s grasp and thrown unceremoniously into the air.

He screamed, his regular human body unable to handle the fall that was coming, when strong arms caught him, pulling him close.

Roman manged to open one eye to see his saviour. They were using the Bee miraculous, donning a light yellow scarf around their neck in addition to the usual skin-tight suit.

They smiled at him, “You alright there, kiddo?”

Roman stared, “Patton..?” he whispered.

“Shh!” Patton insisted, flying over to a rooftop to deposit his boyfriend, “It’s supposed to be a secret!”

Roman couldn’t help but smile as his feet hit the roof, “Well, my _saviour-_ ” Patton giggled, “- what do I call you, then?”

“Honeybee!” he said proudly.

“Well, thank you, then, Ho-” Roman’s brain shut down as _La Mariquita_ landed beside Honeybee.

“Sorry I’m late!” he said, “I’ll get this one to safety, Honeybee, go watch the other’s backs,”

Honeybee saluted, “On it!” and took off.

Roman watched Honeybee disappear, then turned to the imposter, “I don’t know who you think you are but-”

“La Mariquita” disappeared into mist.

“Wha-”

“It’s alright, Roman,” someone donning the fox miraculous came from around a nearby chimney. Wayzz hovered at their side.

Oh.

“Thomas?” he spluttered.

Thomas grinned, “Just covering your butt,”

Roman sighed, “You scared the shit out or me!”

“Just doing my job,” his miraculous beeped, “I should get out of here, though,”

“Stay safe!” Roman called as Thomas disappeared down into the streets. He sighed, and Tikki finally got her chance to speak, flying out of his hoodie.

“Are you sure you’re okay, Roman?”

He took a shaky breath, “No, but they need me down there,”

“Are you ready, then?”

“As I’ll ever be. Tikki, spots on!”

Noir skidded to a stop, pressing one hand against the glass pyramid. The other held his staff out, spinning it with minute movements that a regular human never could. Intrusivity continued to slam his tentacles against the staff, and the makeshift shield was starting to fail. In the corner of his vision he saw Honeybee drop back down to where he and Viper were watching.

 _ **Where is my brother, shitface!?**_ Intrusivity screamed, his fists coming up to assist his barrage.

“I would not tell you even if I knew,” Noir insisted, “And he is not safe around you in this sta-”

 _ **HE’S**_ **MY** _ **BROTHER!**_ Intrusivity was starting to get hysterical, and Noir almost felt bad. At least Roman wouldn’t witness this, _**HE’S ALL I HAVE! WHERE IS HE! I WILL TEAR YOUR SPINE OUT WITH MY TEETH!**_

Noir frowned, “That is a bit of an extre-”

Suddenly, a yo-yo wrapped around Intrusivity’s neck and yanked him backwards, “Sorry I’m late!” La Mariquita quipped, attempting to grab Intrusivity’s wrists as he flew towards him, but only succeeding in getting punched in the gut.

 _ **WHERE IS HE!?**_ Intrusivity shrieked again, grabbing La Mariquita by the hair and throwing him straight through the glass.

Viper left his hiding place and lept onto Intrusivity’s shoulders. His legs wrapped around his neck and with a twist as he fell, the akuma was flung through the hole in the glass he’d made. He grinned at Noir, “Third time’s a charm!” he gave a two-finger salute and lept into the hole after the others. Noir motioned for Honeybee to follow and did the same.

Mariquita was on his feet, motioning for the security guards and frightened tourists to stay back with one hand, and spinning his yo-yo into a shield with the other, “Intrusivity, I promise you, your brother is safe,”

“It’s not your fault,” Honeybee assured him, “but you’re upset, and you’re getting viole-”

 _ **I AM NOT VIOLENT!**_ to prove his point, Intrusivity slammed a tentacle into a nearby pillar and it crumbled into a million pieces.

“Oh, no,” Viper snorted, “of course not,”

Honeybee took a few tentative steps forward, “You’re upset, kiddo, and that’s okay! Sometimes you need to hit things, and I understand that, but right now? You might hurt your brother. Roman, his name is?”

Intrusivity blinked at him, **Yeah... Y-yeah it is...**

“Well, now, here’s the thing, kiddo. Mari and I saw to it that he’d be in a safe place. But he’s pretty shaken up, right now, and very vulnerable. We had to make sure you wouldn’t hurt him, even if it was an accident,”

_**I never meant to-** _

“I know that, sweetheart, we all do! But you’re upset. Something happened that got you on Papilion’s radar, right? Well, he’s pretty good at magnifying people’s emotions. Sometimes, when people get angry, they hit things. Sometimes other people- and right now, with all that power, you could seriously hurt your brother. So we brought him somewhere safe, just for now,”

Intrusivity actually seemed to calm down. Viper put his hand on his partner’s shoulder, “Nice job,”

La Mariquita stepped forward “So, if you want to see your brother, you’re going to have to let us take that akum-”

 _ **Roman doesn’t need to be here for me to take those miraculouses, anyway!**_ he dived for La Mariquita who managed to throw himself out of the way, _**And now I have two more to bring Papilion! We’ll see our mothers again, with our without your-**_

“Papilion promised you that?” La Mariquita whispered. He sounded horrified, “Remus, no power can bring back the-”

Intrusivity lunged, grabbing Mariquita by the collar of his jacket and slamming him into the polished marble of the museum. All the others could do was move to flank the akuma as he pushed their teammate into the wall.

_**You’re wrong. Those pretty little earrings of yours can do just about anything alongside your little kitty’s ring. Creation, destruction, one user.... One wish. Roman and I will see our mothers again, and there’s nothing you can do to stop us!** _

La Mariquita actually started to _cry_ , “L- listen, I don’t- I never-” he grit his teeth, and his knee came up into Intrusivity’s stomach, and he grabbed him by the hair, throwing him across the room. Through tears, La Mariquita shouted, “ _Lucky charm_!”

He just barely had time to catch his creation before Noir grabbed him and dragged him out of the way of the oncoming barrage. He pulled his partner behind several fallen pillars along with the others.

“Are you okay, kiddo?” Honeybee asked.

“Yeah, man,” Viper hesitantly elbowed their leader, “What was that?”

“It’s- it’s- that’s not now that-” he sniffled, “That’s not how any miraculous works!” he sounded frustrated, angry, even, “Dead people can’t- I mean that doesn’t even make any sense!”

Noir scooted so he was in front of La Mariquita and took his hands, “Mariquita, my friend, please,” he squeezed his hands, “We need you to focus,”

La Mariquita nodded, “You’re- you’re right,” he looked at the spotted object in his lap, and frowned, “A mask?” he raised it up, and it matched his exactly.

Viper snickered, “I think we’ve got that covered, Spots,”

La Mariquita looked the room over, “ _Oh_ ,” he whispered, a grin splitting his tear-streaked face, “I’ve got an idea, gentlemen, and I’m going to need some assistance, if you don’t mind,”

“That’s what we’re here for!” Honeybee clapped his hands together.

Viper put a hand over them, “How ‘bout we tone it down a few notches, there, dear?”

La Mariquita shot Viper a confused look, but clearly decided to focus on the matter at hand, “Being excited isn’t anything to frown upon!” he declared, “Just- play along, here, okay?” and he lept over their makeshift barrier.

“Intrusivity!” he called, “I’ve thought it over, and you’re right,”

“What!?” Viper hissed, reaching to his wrist, “What the hell is he thinking!?”

Noir held out a hand to calm him, “Wait, let’s just see,”

 _ **You have?**_ came Intrusivity’s voice, _**That’s wonderful! Just hand over those earrings of yours and we can talk this over!**_

La Mariquita had placed one hand behind his back, and he motioned for them to flank to the left. The group fallowed his orders.

“I mean, can I at least turn around? Get a chance to cover my face and all? I mean- I have a brother, too. If Papilion finds out my identity through you..?”

_**Oh- shit. I mean, yeah. That’s fair, I think.** _

“Glad you see it that way, _mi amigo_ ,” La Mariquita turned around, his hands going to his earrings. What the hell was he thinking?

He flipped his collar up and placed the Lucky Charm’d mask on his face, then pulled his earrings out.

That absolute moron.

He turned back to Intrusivity, who frowned, _**You- you had another mask?**_

La Mariquita chuckled, pulling the collar of his non-transformed jacket up to cover more of his mouth, “What can I say, I’m a planner,” he held out his earrings, and Intrusivity moved to take them.

Honeybee grinned, “Oh, I get it,” he pulled his top from his belt and lunged forward, “ _Venom_!”

 _ **What!?**_ shrieked Intrusivity as he was unable to move. La Mariquita ducked and rolled, pulling into himself as he transformed.

“Tikki, spots on!” La Mariquita bounded to his feet, and his earrings beeped in response to the still active Lucky Charm.

He sauntered forward, and Viper stormed up, poking him in the chest, “Do you even want to know how many times you fucked that up?”

“Not particularly, no,” he grinned at Noir, “If you would, kitty?”

Noir smiled back, “ _Cataclysm_ ,” he said, and gently touched the bracelet on Intrusivity’s wrist.

La Mariquita spun his yo-yo, “No more evil-doing for you, little akuma!” he shouted, throwing his weapon after it. As it caught it, Viper snickered.

“He’s so dramatic,” he threw an arm around Honeybee’s still shaking shoulders.

La Mariquita stuck his tongue out at the snake wielder and grabbed his discarded mask, “ _Miraculous Ladybug_!” he shouted, tossing it to the ceiling.

He turned to hold out a hand to Noir, but motioned for the others, making it into a high-five.

Honeybee clapped, “This was fun!”

Viper snorted, “That’s a word for it,”

As the ladybugs made their way around them, fixing the walls and floors, Remus stumbled to his feet. He didn’t look relieved. He looked quite angry, actually.

“Are you-” La Mariquita attempted to say, but bursting through the crowd- shoving a security guard out of the way in the process- was Dee, who threw himself at Remus and buried his face into his partner’s shoulder.

“Thank god you’re okay!” he practically sobbed, and Remus wrapped his arms around him.

“’m fine, Dee,”

“You were akumatized how could you be-!?” he took a shaky breath and pulled back, putting his hands on the sides of Remus’ face, “Look, let’s just go home. We’ll try to find Roman and Logan on the way, okay?”

Remus looked so horribly sad, and Noir felt that he felt it too.

He could only imagine having the possibility of seeing your dead parents again, only to have it ripped from your grasp.

La Mariquita’s earrings beeped again, “I’d love to stick around, but I gotta get going!” he started running towards the stairwell, “Nice working with you all!”

Noir nodded, “Will you two be alright?”

Remus nodded, “Yeah,”

“Then we’ll be off. Gentlemen, follow me,”

“I’m sorry, Dee,”

The two of them were sitting on the stairs in the front foyer, Remus’ head on his partner’s shoulder, “It’s okay,”

“No, it isn’t. I had him right there- and-”

Dee sighed, “Remus, we didn’t get their miraculouses, that’s true, but you know what we did get?”

Remus paused, sat up and looked at him curiously, “... What?”

“There were two new miraculous holders there,” Dee raised his phone to show- albeit blurry- photos of the new “superheros” that were flooding Instagram, “Which means our theory is true, the guardian is in Paris, and they both know where they are,”

Remus couldn’t help but smile, “And if we find the guardian-”

“- we find their identities,” Dee finished, “So all is not lost, my dear,”

Their little moment was interrupted by a knock on the door. Dee motioned for Remus to stay where he was, and answered it.

Roman and Logan stood there. Roman chuckled nervously, “Um, is everyone okay?”

Remus scrambled to his feet, “Roman, I-”

“Don’t apologize, Re, it’s alright,”

“But-”

“It’s okay. You were akumatized, and god only knows what Papilion ‘promised’-” - he raised his hands and made air quotations as he said that- “you, so it’s all good. La Mariquita brought me to the riverside,” he smiled a little bit and added, “Also, he’s, like, super hot,”

Logan pinched the bridge of his nose, “He wears a mask, Roman,”

“Yeah, a pretty one!” he paused, cleared his throat and said, “Look, I just wanted to make sure you were okay and... And apologize for making this a fight. Any chance we can reschedule?”

Remus kicked at the floor a moment, then smiled, “Yeah. Yeah, I think we can,”


	7. Tying it Together

Virgil tried not to think about it.

He tried not to think about the dozen times La Mariquita- _Roman_ \- failed. How many times Remus screamed at the sight of his brother behind the mask, of the anger and violence and how Virgil only barely managed to give him a Second Chance.

And yet, as he leaned on the bathroom counter at 2 in the morning, here he was. Thinking about it.

He wasn’t stupid enough to tell Patton. He’d just start worrying, and then get himself hurt, probably.

So, no.

He was just going to have to suffer quietly.

“You alright there, Virge?” came Patton’s voice, and Virgil turned to him. He was leaning in the doorway of their bathroom, dressed in sweatpants and a loose blue shirt.  
Virgil wheezed out a laugh, “No, not really...” he admitted, and as Patton stepped forward, putting one hand on Virgil’s back and setting the other over one of the hands on the counter, he leaned his head back onto Patton’s shoulder, “Just the usual anxiety,” he assured him, the tone a hushed, intimate one- one you could have only with your romantic partner.

Patton’s hand rubbed his back, “Is this helping?” he asked.

“You always do,”

Patton smiled, his fingers intertwining with Virgil’s, “I’m glad,”

Virgil turned around, putting his arms around Patton’s neck. He set his head on his chest, just closing his eyes and enjoying the closeness, “I’m just- do you know how many times Mariquita fucked up...?” he squeezed his eyes shut at the memory.

Patton laughed, though there wasn’t any humour in it, “I don’t, kiddo, but... If you want to talk about it-”  
“No... No I just...” he took a deep breath, “It’s not that big of a deal,” he pulled back and smiled, though Patton clearly wasn’t buying it, “It’s fine,”

Patton sighed, “Hey, kiddo, we did our best! I mean, especially considering whatever Papillion and La Peon wanted! God only knows what horrible things they’re up to!”

“ _Game_!” stated the television, and Remus almost threw the Switch controller.

“You cheating son of a bitch!” he shouted, but Nooroo just held up his little hands in victory, Duusu cheering for him.

“That statement implies that I have a parent- which I do not!”

“Ha!” Remus retorted, “Well, jokes on you, because the universe itself is a bitch, so...!”

Duusu nodded sagely, “He’s got you, there,”

Remus threw his hands up, “And the only reason you won, anyway, is because you kept spamming Zelda’s special-”

“Alright, Mr. Down-B, but-”

“It is a _valid_ move, and I wasn’t spamming-”

Dee smiled, sipping his tea. He’d been eliminated the first round- Bayonetta may be floaty to control, but she’s a bad bitch, and the Ideal Form, so....

“Who wants to order a pizza?” he called to the group, causing the argument to slam to a halt.

Duusu was immediately flying around Dee’s head, chanting “Pizza! Pizza! Pizza!” and Dee could only smile apologetically at his companions, “Pepperoni?” he offered.

Remus flopped down onto Dee’s lap, wrapping his arms around his neck and setting his head on his shoulder, “What about pepperoni, mushroom, and dick?”

Dee snorted, “Well, I mean we can get the last one, I promise you that,”

Remus grinned, making a point of shifting his hips, “You’re too good to me,” he cooed, and Dee grinned.

He sighed dramatically setting his tea down on the table beside him, “I am- but you’re going to have to be patient, just like everyone else,” he motioned to the kwamis- who were starting another match. Duusu was doomed.

Remus huffed, “I take it back- this is cruel and unusual punishment.”  
Dee snickered, “You’ll survive, I promise,”

...

Mariquita frowned at the skyline.

“Are you alright?” came Noir’s voice. They were atop the Eiffel Tower’s first floor, where most tourists were starting to trickle out of.

“No,” Mariquita admitted, “Do you- do you have any siblings?”

Noir laughed softly, “No, I’m afraid not, but I will do my best to understand,”

“I just-” he sat down, crossing his legs, “Ever since our moms died, we kinda.... Drifted apart. A lot. I moved out- couldn’t stand to be in that house without them- and he... I don’t know, I’m just worried about him, I guess,”

His partner nodded, “Someone I know is going through something similar,” he said, sitting down next to Mariquita, “And I do not claim to understand your situation, but have you spoken to him about it?”

Mariquita laughed. Imagine having a _normal fucking conversation_ with Remus, “No... He’s not the easiest to talk to. And it always delves into an argument, and...”

Noir frowned, “And...?”

“And it’s just stupid little things that are making me worry! I mean, he can stand and he can walk, but I can _see_ how much it’s hurting him! And he won’t _talk_ about it! I don’t know what’s happening to him, and I can’t _lose_ him and-” he sobbed- the sound shuddering through his body like a stab.

“Oh-” Noir’s arms came around him, pulling his partner into a hug. Mariquita hadn’t realized he needed it so badly- he’d been avoiding Patton and Virgil for the past day or so, his mind reeling from the thought of the two of them using miraculouses. He curled his knees up, burying his face in his partner’s shoulder, “I’m sorry-” he sobbed, “I- I just-”

“Crying is a natural human reaction, my friend. It is necessary for stress relief, and there is nothing to be ashamed of,”

“I know that but-” he sobbed, “I don’t want to bother you, and-”

“You are not bothering me, my friend. Never think that,”

Mariquita sobbed a few more times, and as he was left to sniffle, he muttered, “I’m trying not to,”

And they decided that they could do their patrol from this vantage point, wrapped around each other in much needed comfort.

...

Thomas paced his apartment.

It wasn’t a very long pace, of course, roughly about 25 feet in total. But it was all he could really do right now- Wayzz following his every move.

“We need to find them,”

“I know, Wayzz,”

“If the Peacock is as damaged as we think...”

“I know, Wayzz,”

“We don’t even know whether they’re working together willingly,”

“I know, Wayzz,”

“And if they aren’t, what’s the situation? Is La Peon being held hostage? Is Papilion?”

“I _know_ , Wayzz,”

“And now that Roman’s own family has been targeted, it’s possible that-”

“I _KNOW_ , WAYZZ!” Thomas hadn’t meant to scream, but Wayzz jumped, then sighed.

“My apologies, Master, I shouldn’t have-”

“No, it’s fine, I’m just...” he took a deep, shaky breath, “There has to be a way to track them,”

“Unless the other user consents, it is impossible,” he frowned, “I- it’s a safety precaution,”  
“I know...” he paused to look at his laptop- the one piece of automated technology he had, with about 3 VPNs and a fake name- playing back the footage of last week’s battle.

“Roman said they were arguing...” he said, Wayzz sitting down next to him, “One has to be transformed in order to sense plausible targets, yeah?”

Wayzz nodded, “Yes. It is possible that Papilion simply waits,”

“But you know what’s also possible?” Thomas looked at his kwami, “That Papilion was in the room,”


	8. A Friendly Morning Coffee

“This is a terrible idea,”

It was the 4th time Dee had said that, and it was the 4th time Remus had said, “It’ll be wonderful, love, you’ll see!”

Dee just ground his teeth, “I still don’t-” he sighed, “I don’t think your brother likes me very much,”

Remus laughed, “Roman doesn’t like a lot of people, Dee, don’t take it personally,”

“Yeah, but me, specifically?” he shrugged, “I know I was an asshole in high school, but we’re adults now, right?”

“You realize you’re talking about Roman, right?” Remus stopped in his stride, turning around to take Dee’s hands, “Love, he still refuses to go into that coffee shop on Rue de Pyramides because they fucked up his order _once_ ,” he smiled, “It isn’t personal, he’s just a bitch,”

“That’s _true_ ,” Dee laughed, squeezing Remus’ hands.

“But if you’re that unsure about it, we don’t have to ask. Hell, we don’t even have to _tell_ them,”

“No, no, I want to, I just.... I’m worried,”

Remus pulled Dee closer, kissing him gently, “That’s valid. But I’ll be sure to keep him at arm’s length, okay?”

Dee laughed, “Okay,”

...

“I fail to see why I am here,” Logan said.

Roman was bouncing his leg under the table, and Patton’s hand was on that leg. Patton’s _other_ arm was around Virgil’s shoulder, who was scribbling aimlessly on a few pieces of paper he’d brought.

“We’re moral support, bud,” Thomas assured him, “God knows Roman needs it,”

“Not that I am not touched that you considered me, but are your romantic partners not moral support?”

Roman sighed, “They know Dee and Remus- you’ve only met them twice, and Thomas never has. I just want to be sure that if this becomes an argument, it won’t be _too_ biased,”

“Yeah,” Thomas tapped his fingers against the table nervously, “I mean, you don’t even know what they want to talk about,”

Virgil’s scribbling became more frantic, “Yeah- that’s what we’re worried about,”

“See, kiddo,” Patton and Roman had one of those silent conversations Logan had heard so much about- the ones where you needed only facial expressions... The ones Logan never understood. He could barley read facial expressions on a good day, “When Roman’s moms died, those two were always arguing,”

Virgil grit his teeth, “You mean Remus was always starting a fight-”

“I started some, too, Virge,” Roman said, “But, point is, as you saw, we don’t really get along well, and I’m not in the mood for a public fight,”

Logan nodded, “I understand that,”

Thomas pressed his lips together, “Let’s just hope it doesn’t come to that,”

“It shouldn’t,” Roman said, “Remus has been _super_ apologetic since since the whole akumatization thing, and...” he threw his hands up, “And hopefully, it means he’s going to be reasonable,”

Speak of the devil and he shall appear, Remus entered, Dee on his arm. He waved with the appropriate amount of bravado, the two of them pulling chairs over from the empty table beside them, “Hi, guys!”

Logan nodded respectfully, “Salutations, Remus. It is good to see you again,”

Remus grinned, “You too, Specks,”

“Oh!” Roman motioned to Thomas, “This is Thomas by the way-” Thomas waved, “- we met at that audition in October?”

Remus grinned, “Yeah! Yeah I remember you talking about him!” he leaned forward, “Impressed you’re still dealing with Romano over here- unless you grow up with him he’s kind of a pain in the ass,”

Dee sighed as he sat down next to his partner, setting his coffee down, “We’re being _nice_ today, darling,”

“Oh!” Remus straightened up, “Yes- right!” he smiled, “So, we got two things- one is good news, one is a proposal,”

Patton tilted his head, “A proposal?”

“Can’t imagine this’ll go well,” Virgil grumbled, shooting Dee a smile.

“Don’t be an asshole, Virgil,” Dee snickered, and Virgil appeared to relax.

Logan was, to say the least, surprised. The way he’d talked about Dee Logan had assumed they’d had an antagonistic relationship. But perhaps that was just his general missing social cues.

“Anyway!” Remus held his hands up, “Good news time!” he took Dee’s hand, “He asked me to marry him!”

Roman choked on his latte, “ _What_!?”

“I know!” Remus seemed absolutely giddy, “I said yes, of course!”

Dee sipped his tea, “I thought you would,” he smiled.

Thomas was, of course, grinning like an idiot. Ever the hopeless romantic, “Congratulations!” he said, “That’s wonderful!”

“It is!” Patton agreed.

Roman said, “Wait- wait- hold on,” he coughed a little, “You two have been together _how_ long?”

“Two and a half years,” they said together, and Roman shifted.

Uncomfortable, Logan took a second to realize. What was he uncomfortable about?

God, emotions were confusing.

Patton frowned at his partner, “What’s wrong, Ro?”

“I just- I didn’t even notice! I’m sorry,”

Remus laughed, “Oh, don’t worry about it! It was fun watching you just think we were just guys being dudes!”

Logan frowned in confusion, and Dee snickered, “Just bros hangin’ out, suckin’ each other’s dicks,”

Virgil laughed, “Fellas, is it gay to ask your homie to marry you?”

Thomas shook his head, “No, of course not!”

Logan was not understanding, but as usual, the conversation continued on past him.

“Anyway!” Remus said, “So, we’re engaged, and also, we have an idea,”

Dee said, “There has been so many.... Negative interactions between us-” Logan noticed that Thomas’ nervous tapping increased, “- we thought that a trip out of town would be nice. Normandy’s nice this time of year, so...”

“All of it paid for by us, of course!” Remus said, “I mean, we just kind of want to make it up to you guys,” he smiled at his brother nervously, “Kidnapping and all,”

“I don’t think you can blame yourself for what _Papilion_ did,” Thomas snapped, with just a bit too much force.

It was moments like these that Logan remembered he was the guardian for a reason.

Remus’ smile turned nervous, “Maybe, but...” he sighed, “I could’ve said no,”

“It’s hard,” Virgil said, “Don’t beat yourself up about it,”

Roman held Virgil’s hand, “He’s right- it’s okay, Remus. No one’s mad at you, don’t worry about it.

Remus stared at his nails, “Yeah...” Dee took his hand, and Remus turned his smile up towards them again, “We still want to take you guys up north for a weekend, if you want?”

Thomas stared at the wall beside Logan, “Sure,” he said, which wasn’t what Logan was expecting.

Roman gave him an equally curious look that Logan was giving him, and Logan said, “If you all will have me, I would be delighted,” desperate to make sure Thomas didn’t do anything stupid.

“I will, of course!” Roman said, “Do you to want to...?”

Virgil had his phone out, “Already emailing my profs,”

Patton squeezed both of his boyfriend’s arms, “Friend vacation!”

Thomas nodded, not looking at any of them, “Friend vacation,”


	9. Normandy

Logan shouldered his bag as Thomas closed his apartment- he had about 3 locks, not including the handle and deadbolt- and he frowned, “Do you not have the box with you?”

Thomas pocketed his keys, “I do, yeah,”

“Then why so many?”

Thomas didn’t look at him, “Safer this way,” he grumbled.

Logan hadn’t asked about how the hell a 30 year old actor from Florida became the Guardian of the Miraculous, but he figured it was particularly traumatizing, and considering this paranoid behaviour, he would figuratively bet on it, now.

“I’ll take your word for it,” Logan assured him, “Or... Words. Plural,”

Thomas laughed softly, shoving his several different key sets into his bag, “Let’s go,”

Half an hour later, they stood outside the De Laurens Estate.

Thomas gave a low whistle, “Holy shit,” he whispered, “When he said his moms were loaded...”

Logan nodded, “Yes, he said, quote, ‘old imperial money’,”

Of course, a fucking _limo_ drove up beside them, and Remus poked his head out the door. If he thought adding more purple eye shadow made it less obvious that he looked like death, he hadn’t been looking in the mirror.

Actually, judging by the fact that his eyeliner was bright blue and not even _at all_ , he probably hadn’t.

“What’s up motherfuckers?” he asked, a wild grin on his face.

Thomas looked fabulously uncomfortable, but Logan just pointed upwards, “Relatively speaking, the rest of the universe?”

Remus just laughed, “I like you, Logan, you know that?”

Logan blanched. People didn’t _like_ him, they tolerated him at best. They lived around him, side eyeing him when he didn’t understand “basic” things like metaphors or facial expressions, staring at him as he had to take several minutes before he left the house, checking every little thing to make sure it was right, or cutting him off because he’d been talking about something for nearly 5 minutes and he was boring everyone.

But Remus pulled his head back in the car, not even taking a moment to even laugh at his own joke- because of course it was a joke- and the back door flew open, Roman sticking his head out, “Get in here, dinguses!” he proclaimed, before making his way back into the car.

The limo.

The limousine.

The limousine that was just casually _here_ , and they were casually _in_ , and Logan tried his damnedest not to get anything from his shoes on the carpet- the _carpeted_ floors. In a moving vehicle- setting his bag down at his feet. Roman had left a space open beside him, and motioned for Logan to come over, “This’ll be fun!” he was practically vibrating in his seat, and from the driver’s seat Dee laughed.

“I’m glad you think so!” he said.

Virgil turned around, “So, I gotta ask- how the hell do you get ‘Dee’ from ‘Julius’?”

Dee turned them onto the highway out of the city, “Well, Julius is kinda.... Masculine? Like more so than Dee.... And, like, obviously I don’t owe anyone androgyny-”

Logan frowned, “You do not wish to perform masculinity?”

Dee frowned, “I mean... I _do_ , but I also don’t. Like... Like people hear Julius and think ‘ah yes- a man’, which...” he shifted- uncomfortable? “I mean, I’m not, so-”

Roman said, “Wait, wait- when did this-” he paused, “I mean, you don’t need to tell me that, that’s none of my business, but just so we all know, here-”

Dee laughed a little, “Non-Binary,” he said, “And I still use he/him, don’t worry,”

Roman looked like he’d just been slapped, “Huh,”

“If you misgendered me, Remus would’ve murdered you anyway,”

Remus turned back and smiled, “I would!”

...

The city of Caen is a historic one- the site of D-day landings, on which the beaches are still relatively unsafe to walk, what with being active mine fields, the capital of William the Conqueror, with buildings dating back to his reign, and was the site of quite a lot of revolutionary sentiment.

Of course, Roman was ignoring all of that, and instead pulling his boyfriends (and Logan) around to find a good coffee shop.

Roman was talking again, oh shit.

“.. and when we were 7, Remus got fucking _arrested_ here!” he pointed into a bakery, “Dumbass jumped the counter and tried to steal some macrons,”

Patton laughed, “Oh, I remember that!”

Virgil leaned on Roman’s shoulder, “Celeste was _furious_ ,”

Logan frowned, “A child was arrested?”

Patton grinned, “Well, it was more of a ‘Celeste and Angelique dragged him out of the store, paid the baker double and he was grounded to the hotel room’ than an arrest, but,” he shrugged, “It was basically an arrest,”

Roman laughed softly, “Oh, I never tried to steal anything ever again, after that,” he said, “Remus did, but I think the night he spent in jail when we were 16 was the last time, or at least the last time he got caught,”

Virgil smiled, “Oh, you should’ve heard the way my parents lost their mind at that!” he said, “It was the most blatantly homophobic bullshit-”

Patton sighed, “The usual?”

Logan frowned, “What- what homophobic bullshit?”

Virgil sighed as Roman finally decided on a small shop on a corner, dragging them all inside, “Just the usual, ‘this is why a boy needs a father’ and what not,” he shrugged, “I don’t talk to them for a reason,”

Don’t talk to...?

Logan grabbed Virgil’s arm, “You just- you just don’t talk to them?” he asked, “How do you- I mean, aren’t you scared they’ll track you down?”

Virgil snorted, “And then what? Scream at me that I’m ‘tarnishing the family legacy’ and stand on the sidewalk outside of our building until I call the cops? I’m not afraid of them,” he frowned, “Why? Are... Are you afraid of that?”

Logan laughed miserably, “Calling the police on my father,” he laughed again, “Considering how well that went last time, I wouldn’t imagine that’s a good idea,”

Virgil suddenly looked scared- eyebrows curled in, eyes wide, pupils dilated. Fear- “Logan, you’re an adult. You can cut contact with your father if you need to,”

Logan’s hands shook at the very idea. He adjusted his glasses, “No, no, no, it’s... It’s quite alright, I’m simply... Over-reacting,”

“It doesn’t sound like-”

“Virgil,” Logan insisted, “I don’t... I don’t want to talk about this right now. Please,”

Virgil nodded, “Alright. Whenever you’re ready, though, we’re all here for you,”

Again with the jokes, huh? Logan nodded, “Yes,” he said, trying not to let that one sting.

Virgil smiled, “Then let’s get something caffeinated. You’re English, right?”

“Welsh, actually,”

“Well, you’re from the UK,”

“Sadly,”

“Point is, they have tea,”

Logan smiled and shook his head, “You’re lucky I do actually like it, or that might’ve been offensive,”

Virgil laughed- his loud, hearty laugh. The one that made Logan’s heart skip a beat- and pulled him towards the line.

Logan really hated getting attached.


	10. Almost an Akuma

“... All I’m saying is that Klaus deserves better,” Roman concluded, waving Thomas over as he finally came into the shop, “Finish your thing?” he asked.

That ‘thing’ had been double and triple checking the locks on his room, and even now, Roman could tell he had the box with him.

“I did, yeah, thanks for understanding,”

“Of course, kiddo!” Patton grinned, “Whatever makes you feel comfortable!”

Thomas sat down, Logan handing him his coffee, “Oh!” Thomas said, “Thank you, what is it-”

“A caramel latte with 2 shots of chocolate, and extra whip,”

“You...” Thomas almost looked touched, “You remembered that?”

“I have Hyperthymesia- a perfect memory,” he turned his eyes down, “Also, you are my friend. You enjoy caffeinated beverages quite a lot- thus, I remember,”

“Still... I appreciate it, buddy,” he smiled, “That’s actually really cool!”

Virgil said, “Shit, yeah! That’s _really_ fuckin’ cool!”

Logan was clearly his best to hide his blush, putting his tea down. Oh, no, he was cute, “You... You are all far too kind to me,”

“What, the regular amount of kind to a super cool guy?” Patton asked, “We _do_ like spending time with you, kiddo,”

Roman smiled at him, “I mean, I know we didn’t get along at first. But you didn’t have to come all the way to Remus’, and deal with... All of that. But you did! And I appreciate it!”

“You’re our friend, dingus,” Virgil said.

Logan wasn’t looking at them, instead looking into his tea with a very... Confused expression. Why he would be confused, Roman didn’t understand, but Logan suddenly stood, “I have to-” and sprinted out of the cafe.

“Shit,” Virgil said, “I think... I think we overwhelmed him,”

Patton took his hand, “I’m sure he’ll be okay, he just... Needs some space,”

Roman nodded, “I just hope he doesn’t get lost,”

Logan threw himself into an alley, sliding down the wall as a panic attack set in. Plagg was saying something, but he wasn’t hearing any of it.

“They called me their _friend_ ,” he whispered, and Plagg took his finger with his little kwami hands.

“Yeah, bud, they did. I told you- they really do like hanging out with you,”

“But that doesn’t-” Logan wheezed as his lungs started to contract, “That doesn’t make sense!”

“Kid, we’ve been over this- your dad’s a liar and an asshole-”

“No, he’s _right_. I’m a _freak_ , and a _weirdo_ , and no one will ever love me, and-”

“Logan!” Plagg insisted, “None of that is true! You’re the best owner I’ve ever had!”

“Stop-” Logan sniffled, “Stop lying to me,”

“I’m not! Why do you keep listening to-”

“Because he’s my _father_!” Logan practically shrieked it, “If I could shut him out, I would! But I-” he sobbed, “I can’t!” he curled his knees up to his chest, Plagg sitting on his shoulder, “I can’t...”

He sobbed, and it hurt, and he squeezed his eyes shut, and the tears were hot, and he didn’t _understand_.

He didn’t understand why people lied to him, pulled him along and made fun of him. He didn’t understand how Virgil so casually cut off his parents, and didn’t understand why he _couldn’t_? Why couldn’t he?

Why was he terrified to do so?

Because he was a coward.

He was _such_ a coward.

...

Papilion smiled to himself, “Imagine that,” he said, turning to Remus, “Right away- anger, confusion, self hatred...” he hummed.

Remus grinned taking his hands, “Who is it?” he asked, and Papilion looked sad, suddenly,

“Logan,”

“... Oh,”

“Let’s give him a healthier way to get his emotions out, shall we?”

“Hey, dude,”

Logan looked up, jumping at the sight of Roman, “Roman!” he sniffled, wiping his eyes, “I-”

“I know you probably need your space,” Roman said, kicking the ground at his feet nervously, “I just wanted to apologize... We didn’t mean to overwhelm you, we just-”

“It’s... It’s fine, Roman,”

“But it isn’t, though! We should’ve realized you were freaking out and respected your boundaries!”

“... It’s fine, Roman,”

“Clearly it isn’t, you-” Roman froze in his movements, “How-?”

Logan looked up, seeing a black and purple butterfly fluttering towards him. He yelped, leaping to his feet. He stumbled backwards, and he tripped, landing on his hands, backflipping several times out of the way.

Huh. Muscle memory is one hell of a thing.

But it kept coming towards him, and Roman lunged.

Grabbing the akuma with his bare hand.

Papilion frowned, turning towards his partner with a ‘You won’t believe this shit,’ glance, “Hello, Prince. My name is Papilion, and I have an offer for you. You want to protect your friends, right? Just bring me Noir and La Mariquita’s miraculouses, and-”

“ _No_ ,”

Papilion blinked, “I’m- I’m sorry?”

“ _No_!”

Roman slammed his fist against the wall, shouting his refusal with the ferocity only Roman could have, and the akuma fluttered away.

Logan stared at him, “You-”

Roman looked up at him- his eyeliner and mascara was running down his face, “Yeah!”

“I didn’t know you could...!”

“I didn’t know anyone could!”

“Nooroo, dark wings fall,”

Remus stared at him, “What- what happened!?”

“He fought it off...”

“Logan?!”

“Roman,”

“ _Roman_!? Why Roman?”

“He took it for Logan,”

Remus frowned. He made his way over to Dee, wrapping his arms around him. He set his chin on Dee’s shoulder, “That’s... _Interesting_ ,”

“It takes quite a bit of willpower to do something like that,” Nooroo said.

“Well,” Remus nodded, “That too, but... I think we have a new way to get under Roman’s skin,”

“... I think so, too,”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> damn guys i think logan's got some shit going on  
> 


	11. Revelations I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you know i could make this not a two parter but why do that when i can make y'all suffer >:3  
> 

So, Roman fought off an akuma.

Roman fought of an akuma _for Logan_ , which felt...

Confusing.

Confusing was a word for it- and it was also a feeling. Logan was somewhat used to being confused, he interacted with people all the time and he was usually left in the dust with social situations.

But this was different.

Setting aside how an akuma got to Caen, Roman had fought it off for him.

For _him_.

 _Logan_.

 _Logan Abbot_.

Not Noir, not some other obscure version of himself that Logan did not understand.

Just him.

Just Logan.

And it was baffling.

Even still, he walked alongside Roman, who was quite a sight with his make up running down his face, sniffling as they went, “Are you alright, Roman?” Logan asked him.

Roman sniffled, “Nah- I guess I didn’t realize how much it hurts to get that fucker in your head,”

“Hurts...?”  
“... Emotionally...” Roman turned to look at him. Logan was impressed with the strength of the bags under his eyes, “He... _Finds_ what hurts the most. I don’t know how I manged to say no...”

They’d come back to the cafe, and the group ran out, “Roman!” Patton jumped forward, taking his hands, “Roman, what _happened_?”

“Almost got akumatized,” Roman shrugged, and Logan could see Thomas freeze.

“... Akumatized?” he asked, “We’re not anywhere _near_ Paris!”

Logan nodded, “That was my thought, as well,”

Virgil looked at Roman nervously, “What do you mean you _almost_ got akumatized? Who _did_?”

“No one,”

Logan said, “Roman... Fought it off,”

Virgil had pulled make up wipes from his bag and took Roman’s face in his hand, starting to wipe it off, “You fought off _an akuma_?” he sounded mystified, “Holy shit,”

Roman laughed nervously, “... Yeah...”

Thomas had gone noticeably pale, “You must be incredibly strong-willed, Roman,”

“What can I say, I’m a dreamer,” he shrugged.

“Let’s just,” Patton sighed, “Let’s just go back to the hotel, guys,”

Thomas gripped the handle of his bag, “Yeah-” he was looking around himself a lot, “Let’s,”

As they reached the hotel, Thomas pulled Logan back, “I need to tell you something,”

Logan nodded, letting Thomas pull him aside, “About the akuma? Yes, I am worried as well-”  
“I have a theory for that,”

“You-” Logan blinked, watching the others turn to look at them as Thomas motioned them away, “What is your theory, then?”

“I believe I know who Papilion is,”

Logan stared at him, “.... What?”

“Listen to me. This is gonna sound _fucking_ crazy,” Thomas took Logan’s arms, “But I think... Dee is Papilion,”

“... What...?”

“Hear me out,” Thomas blew his hair out of his face, “How did Papilion _know_ about the argument between the twins at just the right moment? How was he here when we were? Unless transformed, he can’t sense strong emotions- and unless he’s standing there scanning for hours, which I doubt...” he shrugged, “It’s just- too convenient,”

Logan nodded, “That... That makes sense,”

“It does?” Thomas blinked, “I mean- of course it does!” he threw his hands out, “So, what I’m saying is- do not trust him,”

Logan frowned, “Would it not make more sense to gain his trust, enough that he would lead us right to the miraculouses?”

“...” Thomas frowned, “That... That makes sense, actually!”

“I sincerely hope so,”

Thomas nodded rapidly, “Okay, so, just... Get close to him. Close enough for him to lead you to it,”

“... How close is that?”

“Very,” Thomas grimaced, “Whomever is using the Peacock is _incredibly_ close with him, by the sound of it,”

“You do not believe it could be Remus, do you?”

“No,” Thomas admitted, “Remus doesn’t seem... Physically well enough to deal with a miraculous,”

Logan nodded, “Yes, I was thinking that as well. I do hope he gets medical treatment,”

“So do I,” Thomas took Logan’s arms again, “I’ll pass this on to Mariquita, don’t worry. I’ll keep out identifying information as best as I can,”

“Dee,” Roman repeated about an hour later.

Thomas had insisted that they speak alone, texting him in order to make it “not too weird” for Logan.

“Dee,” Thomas insisted, “Doesn’t it make sense?”

Roman laughed humourlessly, “Thomas- Dee’s a prick, but he’s not _Papilion_ levels of prick,”

“Do you truly know that?” Wayzz asked, “You did not even know of he and your brother’s relationship,”

Tikki smiled nervously, “I mean- I hate to tell you this, Roman, but he’s right. You don’t know him as well as you wish you did,”

Roman frowned.

As much as he hated to admit it, it was true. Even before their moms died, the twins had drifted apart. In secondary school, Roman had fell in with Patton and Virgil, and Remus with Dee. Roman had starred in school plays and spoken at assemblies, while Remus had set things on fire and gotten in trouble for smoking on school property.

Roman had gone to the funeral, and Remus had locked himself in his room for days.

And that had really been the shattering point, huh? When he’d stared his own reflection in the face and realized he could no longer see _Remus_ ’ there either. That after all those years of being inseparable, and the two of them swapping clothes and gossip and even tests, they were two different people now.

And Roman didn’t even know him anymore.

“.... I...” Roman dug his fingers through his hair, pulling the scrunchie out as he went, “I-” he turned on his heel, just leaving.

“Roman!” Thomas called after him, “Wait!”

But Roman just muttered, “Tikki, spots on,” and La Mariquita lept out the window at the end of the hall.

It was invigorating and freeing, somehow, leaping across a new set of rooftops.

He’d only ever seen Caen from the streets, and just as before, he was amazed by the _difference_. He landed on top of one of the flag poles on the beach, too upset to even think about it possibly being disrespectful, and just stared out over the Atlantic.

He was angry, and sad, and miserable, yes, but at who? At Thomas? Dee? Papilion (If they weren’t the same person)? Remus?

... Himself?

.... How many of those mines were still active on the shore? Could they still kill him with a miraculous active....?

“Um, La Mariquita..?”

Mariquita turned to the voice, seeing Logan staring up at him. What the hell was he doing out here? “... Yes?”

“Are you... What are you doing here?”

Realizing Logan was probably shouting, he dropped down to the ground, “I’m just..” he wiped his eyes, “Had to think, I guess,” he turned a lopsided grin to Logan, hoping he could put on the act for just one more second, “It’s a lot faster to run like this, though, than take a train,”

Logan didn’t appear to buy it, just tilting his head, “You’ve been crying,”

“I...” Mariquita sighed, “Yeah, I have. Like I said- I needed to think,”

“There is no shame in that,” Logan said, “Crying helps alleviate stress, it can be good for the skin, and it is a natural human reaction,”

Mariquita laugh-sniffled, “You sound like Noir,”

Logan bristled, “I... I did not mean to offend,”

“You didn’t,” he smiled, “I... I actually kind of needed that,” he smiled, “Thanks, dude,” he said, “I’m- uh- going to get back to my brooding, if you don’t mind,”

“No, not at all!” Logan smiled again, and Mariquita lept up onto the flag pole again.

... Were Logan’s eyes the same colour as the ocean?

Oh.

_Oh no._

...

By the time the sun had set, Noir decided to join his partner.

Call him sentimental, but he hated to see him in distress.

Besides- if Thomas’ theory about Dee was correct, La Mariquita was in danger by being this close.

“You appear distressed, my friend,” he said, dropping down onto the cathedral’s roof, “Unless you take spontaneous trips to Normandy while transformed for leisure,”

La Mariquita laughed bitterly, “You’re a detective and a half, there, chaton,”

“Is this about the guardian’s theory?” Noir asked, sitting down next to him, “I see no reason to be distressed- if we can track down his identity-”

“But what if he’s wrong?” La Mariquita snapped, turning to him. There was something wild in his eyes- desperate and angry, “What if he’s wrong?” he took his friend’s hands, “He doesn’t have to be right! We don’t- I mean-” he laughed miserably, “I mean, what if Papilion was someone you _knew_ , Noir-”

“Do you know his proposed identity? Has the guardian passed that information on to you?”

“He-” the colour drained from La Mariquita’s face, “I... Look, that isn’t important-”

“It is incredibly important,” Noir argued, “If you are distressed-”

“Look, he told me who he thinks it is because I know the guy. Not as well as I should, but I _do_ , and...” he sniffled, “He can’t be _right_ , Noir! It has to be a mistake!”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because my brother would never _marry_ Papilion!”

Noir’s heart almost stopped.

“Your brother-”

“Yes! He would never! I-” he sobbed, “God, but that’s the worst part, right? I don’t _know_ if he wouldn’t! I don’t know, Noir, I...” he dropped into his partner’s chest, and Noir held him close.

“It will be alright, my friend... I promise,”

Behind the spire, La Peon grit his teeth, and took off back towards the hotel.


	12. Revelations II

La Peon threw his fan at the beach for the 5th time. He wanted to see something _explode_.

“Sir!” La Peon turned with a snarl to the sight of several police officers. To be fair, he _was_ standing on top of the D-Day museum, trying to explode 70 year old mines, “Please get down from the-”

La Peon held his hand out, and the fan flew back to his hand, “No,” he examined the feathers for a moment, then asked, “You fellas seen Noir and La Mariquita? Heard they were out here- and I feel the need to shatter some bones,” he laughed a bit, leaping down to get into the officer’s faces, “I mean- I would if I could! Don’t think those fuckers have any I _can_ break!” he laughed- both because he was _furious_ , and because it was easy to keep officers on their toes if they thought he was a madman.

The officers stared at him, and the one in the front asked, “... Who...?”

“Those Parisian super heroes!” said the one behind them.

“I think that guy’s a bad guy-”

La Peon snickered, “Oh- you believe good and bad aren’t subjective terms! You poor soul, you!” he pulled a feather from his fan, and watched the officers scramble back.

The one in the front asked, “Am I supposed to be threatened?”

“If you know what’s good for you,” La Peon took another step forward, and slammed the amuk into their badge, “You _should_ be,” he smiled, watching an akuma slip into the badge as well.

“Hello, Orderly,” La Peon said, “My name is La Peon,”

 _And my name is Papilion._ came his voice.

“And we’re giving you the power to make anyone and everyone listen- and follow the rules,”

_All that we ask is that you get us Noir and La Mariquita’s miraculouses._

“Is that fair?” La Peon asked, “Do you think...?”

“Oui, Papilion!” Orderly shouted, “Oui, La Peon!”

The Peacock holder stepped backwards and ducked out of sight, smiling to himself.

Oh, how he loved unhealthy coping mechanisms.

Roman flopped back onto his bed, trying not to feel as angry and bitter as he did.

And failing miserably.

“You appear distressed,” Roman looked up to the sight of Logan, his hair slightly windswept. Had he gone out? “As such, I- um-” he placed the hot drink cup on the night stand beside him, “It is... Hot cocoa,”

“Oh..!” Roman sat up, “Logan!” he smiled for the first time in hours, “That’s- that’s so sweet!”

Logan cleared his throat, “Yes, well... You appear distressed, and hot beverages tend to aliviate stress, even simply by holding them. And you have expressed a love for hot cocoa in the past, so-”

“Logan,” Roman said, taking the drink into his hands, “.. Thank you,”

“It is... No trouble at all,” Logan sat down on his bed, twisting his ring nervously. He always wore that- Roman wondered distantly why, “... May I ask what is troubling you? ‘Talking about it’, to use the colloquialism, is beneficial to one’s mental health... Of course you are under no obligation to tell me if you do not wish to,”

Roman stared at the steam coming off of his drink, “... I just...” he sighed, “I came to the realization that I don’t know Remus as well as I should,” he laughed miserably, “That probably sounds stupid but-”

An explosion suddenly rocked the city, and the two of them scrambled to the window, seeing a police officer flying around, “You _will_ bow before me, Caen! You _will_ follow the law!”

“....” Logan looked particularly distressed, and Roman was feeling it, too.

... If Dee _really_ was Papilion...

“Is that-” Logan tilted his head, “Is that an akuma?”

“It does appear to be that, yes,” Roman said, “I’m...” he turned on his heel, “I’m gonna go make sure Patt and Virge are okay,”

Logan nodded rapidly, “Yes- yes- I will-” he motioned to the bathroom, “Hide in the bathroom,”

“A good strategy,”

Roman knocked on the door to Thomas’ room instead, “Thomas, I’m sorry-”

Thomas just opened the door and dragged him in, “No time for apologies, Roman,”

“You’re right, but I just wanted to-”

“ _Roman_ -”

“Right! Tikki- spots on!”

La Mariquita winked at his partner as he fell into step alongside him, his breakdown apparently forgotten in the dust, “I get a few miles out of town, and we’re already needed!”

Noir didn’t believe that, considering they’d just spoken no less than 5 minutes ago, but he wasn’t willing to let La Mariquita know that he knew that, so he just nodded, “Yes, it does appear that we were followed,”

La Mariquita snickered, “It does!”

Noir grabbed La Mariquita, pulling him back from the fan that was thrown at them, “Hello, my dears!” La Peon shrieked.

There was something behind his eyes Noir couldn’t place- he wasn’t quite good at placing facial expressions to begin with, but La Peon looked near tears. His hands were shaking, even as he caught the fan, “Oh, my apologies!” he bowed dramatically, “How _are_ you on this wonderful _fucking_ day, hmm?”

Noir blinked, “Are you well? You appear...” he took a nervous step forward, “Frantic,”

“Oh, I’m fucking _wonderful_ , Kitty Cat!” he grabbed Noir’s shoulders, “I’m fucking...” he leaned in close, close enough that Noir could feel his breath, “... _Wonderful_ ,”

“It does not appear so,” Noir said, not even flinching, “I would not recommend using a miraculous when in such a st-”

La Peon shrieked, “I’m _FINE_!” and grabbed Noir’s wrist in an attempt to go for his ring, but La Mariquita was several steps ahead of him, his yo-yo grabbing him by the neck and throwing him down into the street.

“I’ll deal with him!” La Mariquita said, “Go deal with the akuma!”

“I cannot-” Noir took his friend’s shoulders, “I cannot purify akumas, La Mariquita. And we are a _team_ ,”

“Now isn’t the time to be-” La Mariquita was grabbed by the front of his jacket, and dragged down into the street. Noir jumped after him, trying to drag La Peon off of him as he was just _punching_ him.

“You’re a fucking _liar_!” La Peon was shrieking, actually managing to break La Mariquita’s nose, “You’re a _liar_ , and a _snake_ , and I _hate you_!”

Noir got him off, throwing him 20 feet down the street, “E _NOUGH_!” he motioned for La Mariquita to stay down, even as he didn’t, and stormed after La Peon, “You are being a _child_!”

La Peon laughed, peeling himself off the concrete and wiping the blood off his face, “I wish I could be a child again...”

Noir sighed, “We all do, but that is no excuse for your actions,” he squatted down in front of him, motioning to the general sound of screaming, “Release the amuk- make the right decision here,”

La Peon laughed again, “ _Not_ happening, Catpurnicus,”

“Was that a reference to the 15th century polymath Nicolaus Copernicus?” he felt a small bit of pride surge through himself, “... I appreciate it,”

“He’s _mocking_ you, chaton,” La Mariquita was on his feet, now, “Let’s go deal with that akuma,”

Noir nodded, feeling that pride deflate.

Of course.

“Yes,” he let La Mariquita lead them away to the akuma, who shrieked at the sight of them,

“Vigilantism is a crime!”

“Oh, _wonderfu_ -” Noir pulled him out of the way _again_ ,

“You do not appear to have recovered from your emotional moment earlier tonight, my friend,” he observed, and La Mariquita laughed humourlessly.

“No shit!” he snapped, “I’m fucking-” he dug his fingers through his hair- or, at least tried to before he hit the hair tie, “ _Fuck_!”

“You are... Distressed..?” Noir fiddled with his hands, “My apologies, I am not the best with these things,”

“Don’t apologize, dude,” La Mariquita tightened his ponytail, “It isn’t your fault. Now let’s just-”

They were suddenly dragged aside by someone else as the akuma lunged at them again.

Someone using the Turtle Miraculous was looking like they’d just seen the two of them murder someone, “What the hell are you two doing!? Deal with this!” they motioned to the akuma, “Personal bullshit later!”

“.... Thomas...?” La Mariquita asked, and he rolled his eyes.

“Dude! Ever heard of subtly!?”

Noir chuckled a bit, “That is not exactly his strong suit, Master,”

Thomas sighed, “No- it really isn’t,”

“Hey!” La Mariquita objected, “Is it Bully Mariquita Hours today, or something?”

Thomas snickered, “It could be,” the akuma was still looking for them, and Thomas cracked his knuckles, “How ‘bout I teach you boys something, today, huh?”

Noir tried not to vibrate _too_ hard, “... About the miraculouses?”

Thomas grinned, “Absolutely,” he stepped into the sight of the akuma- and the amuk, if the badge whirling around their head like some sort of Law Halo was anything to go by, “What’s your name, stranger?”

“I am Orderly! And vigilantism is a crime!”

Thomas pulled the shield from his back, raising it up as the attack came at him, then flicked his hand out to summon a _second_ one, “That it is- but do you think the police are equipped to deal with suck powerful foes?”

Orderly just screamed at him, and Thomas threw the second shield at them, watching them fall. And his miraculous _glowed_ , summoning another shield, he tossed it to Noir, “Keep a hold on that for me, would you?” and he lept down into the streets.

Noir and La Mariquita scrambled to the edge. Police barricades had been put up, but watching Thomas fight- watching him fight with a _miraculous_ \- was a sight to behold. He was remarkably fast, throwing punches with one hand, and using the smaller shield he’d summoned on his wrist to block, “Come on- give me a challenge, here!”

Noir and La Mariquita turned to stare at each other. They’d known Thomas had used a miraculous before, but... But this was something else. It was like watching a dancer, almost- which... They were- but his ability to just keep going was impressive none the less.

Could one summon more than one weapon at once? Could one _control_ it? The thought alone had Noir shaking a bit.

Thomas paused, pacing two fingers on Orderly’s forehead.

“What are you-”

“ _Shell-ter_ ,”

The great green shield spread from his fingers- not his shield, Logan noted- and encased Orderly where they stood, despite their screaming to the contrary. Thomas pulled his hand back, motioning for his apprentices to come deal with this.

Noir lept down first, “You... Can summon several?” he asked, and Thomas nodded,

“Yup! With enough practice, you can even use that power of yours without a timer,” he waved his wrist to prove his point- it had not begun to beep.

“Huh,”

La Mariquita dropped down, though he didn’t appear as excited, “Cool. Whatever. Let’s just deal with this,”

Noir nodded. He most likely wanted to return home and cry- he had not had a good day, today, “I will be as fast as I can, my friend,” he raised a finger, “ _Cataclysm_ ,” and leaned in to touch the badge, Thomas pulling the shield back just enough for him to reach.

Mariquita didn’t even give a dramatic speech as he caught the akuma.

La Peon slipped in through the window, transformed, and almost hacked up a lung.

He just might have, actually, the amount of blood that came through his lips. Dee managed to get him down onto the floor, shaking in his arms the entire way, “Why did you do that!?” Dee demanded through his tears, “You can’t stay transformed that long _and_ create a sentimonste-”

“Roman is Mariquita,” was all Remus could find himself to say through his coughs.

And it was true. He’d heard the rant, seen the tears. It made far too much sense. Only one person would be able to fight off an akuma- and that was the one person strong enough to use the Ladybug.

“... What!?” Dee demanded, taking Remus by his shoulders, “You’re delirious from blood loss, you’re-”

“Wounds on my face healed pretty quick, don’t worry,”

“That’s not what I meant!” Dee handed him a glass of water and his prescription, “I’ll go get you some tea- you just-”

Remus nodded, hacking into a kleenex again.

Roman almost ran right into Roman as he opened the door, “Oh-!”

Roman still had a broken nose, Remus was proud to say. Had the bastard actually cared he would’ve healed it,

“Oh, no!” Remus pointed at his brother, “You stay the fuck out! You’re the last-” he coughed again, grabbing another kleenex.

“Remus!” Roman had the gall to look distressed, “Can we just- can we talk,”

Dee huffed, closing the door, thank god, and Remus manged to cough into his tissue again.

“You don’t know this for sure, Master,” Nooroo said gently.

Dusuu wailed, and at least had the brains to make it sound like Remus. Which made Remus start crying through his coughs, because this little kwami was so nice to him.

Outside the door, Roman hissed, “What the hell is going on? Is he-”

“It’s not my place to tell you that, Roman,” Dee walked past him- a man on a mission, apparently, “If he hasn’t told you, I’m not going to, either,”

Roman nodded, “... Is he sick...?”

Dee was quiet for a moment, then said, “He’s hurt,”

“Can I do anything?”

“You can leave him alone. He clearly doesn’t want to see you right now,”

Roman tried not to let that sting, “... Can you at least tell him I’m sorry?”

Dee snorted, moving into the lobby, “You can tell him yourself whenever he wants to see you,”

“Dee-”

“ _Roman_ ,” Dee wheeled on him, “Please. Just give him the space he asked for,”

Roman nodded silently, “... Okay,”


	13. I'm Soft that's it That's the Chapter Title

Remus sobbed into his tissue again.

He was _fucking angry_ , if that wasn’t too obvious.

He wanted to cry, and scream, and throw something and _fucking break something_.

But instead he just cried, trying to down the tea so his throat could stop hurting and his mouth could taste of anything but blood.

“Just breathe for me, babe,” Dee was quiet. He was rarely quiet, but when he was it was intimate like this, “I’m here. Nooroo’s here. Dusuu’s here. We’re all here,”

Dusuu, of course, kept wailing, but Remus just held onto Dee’s hand. He just held it and cried.

“’m fine...” Remus attempted, more out of habit than anything. Dee just smiled sadly,

“Drink your tea, love. I’m here for you,”

“... Thank you,”

And they sat like that for nearly an hour.

“So,” Dee finally said, setting himself down onto the floor beside him, “what’s your evidence?”

“First of all- we’re here for 10 hours and La Mariquita shows up? 3 hours after Roman fights off an akuma?” Dee nodded, and Remus chugged his tea again, “And- like- I was listening in on their conversation, right? And they said the guardian had a theory of your identity- and that they _told_ him. That he _knew_ you. That... That his brother would never marry anyone like that...”

“Okay,” Dee nodded, “It is convenient that La Mariquita would show up just when we do- but hundreds of tourists come to Caen every day, Remus,”

“Who else could fight off an _akuma_ , Dee?” Remus demanded, sniffling, “Who else but the Ladybug holder?” Dee nodded, “Also! His nose was _broken_ earlier! Because I broke it! Would’ve done more, but fuckin’ Noir...”

Dee paused stirring his drink, “Remus,”

“Yes, love?”

“... The person who used the Turtle,”

“What about them?”

“They would’ve had to come to Caen as well, right? Fast enough to see what was going on?”

“That’s not-”

“Not possible, yes,” Dee set his drink down, “Which means the guardian was already _here_. Already in town, from Paris,”

“What are you saying?”

“... I believe our guardian is much closer than we first thought,”

“So- I don’t get what he’s upset about...” Roman mumbled, curling his fingers through Patton’s hair. He was sitting on Patt’s lap, his head on his shoulder, with Virgil curled up next to them.

“He’s probably just trying to protect you, kiddo,” Patton assured him, “Doesn’t want to worry you,”

“He’s always been big on keeping up an image,” Virgil said, “Repression city, that one,”

Roman laughed a bit, sitting up to look at Virgil, “Says _you_ ,”

“Exactly!” Virgil laughed, “I know what I’m talking about!” and because Virgil laughed, Roman laughed. And then Patton did, too. Roman set his head back on his shoulder,

“I just... I respect his privacy, of course, I just wish I knew what was wrong and how I can help, if I even can...”

“I get that,” Virgil grumbled, “You’d just kill for a second chance?”

Roman blinked, turning to look at Virgil curiously again. He’d gathered that Honeybee and Patton were the same person quite easily, and his judgment that Virgil was Viper was slightly unfounded, based only on the intimacy the two of them had shown with each other.

Logan would call that “jumping to conclusions”, but Roman was about 99% sure he was right.

“What?” Virgil blinked at him innocently, and Roman grinned,

“Sometimes I do- but I’m not good at spur of the moment decisions, My Dark and Stormy Knight,”

Virgil snorted, “You’re a fucking dork, Princey,”

“And you are an insufferable negative nancy!”

Patton just laughed, “I love you both, too!”

“Seriously, though,” Roman muttered, “I... I don’t know how to deal with this? Not knowing what’s wrong with him, not knowing how to help....”

“You don’t have to help everyone,” Patton said, quieter than he’d intended.

“...” That was true, technically.

But that didn’t mean it wouldn’t tear him up inside.

He was a _superhero_. He was La Mariquita- he was supposed to help. He was _supposed_ to be able to, to use the Lucky Charm and make everything okay again, but how was he supposed to do this when it wasn’t an akuma or amok? How was he supposed to deal with it when his brother was clearly _suffering_ and in _pain_ and maybe _dying_? How?

How was he supposed to deal? If he couldn’t help? If he couldn’t make it better? He didn’t want to just sit there and watch him suffer, but if he pushed and made it worse?

God, what if he made it worse? All he did was make things worse. He was the fucking Bad Shit Happen Magnet! He nervously got to his feet, starting to pace, “But-”

“No buts, mister,” Patton said, “Take it from me, kiddo, driving yourself to insanity by trying to help everyone is... Unhealthy,”

“What!?” Roman demanded, “So I’m just supposed to _sit_ there! Just _sit_ there while he suffers!?”

“That’s not what I said-”

“Well then what!? What am I supposed to do!? Just-”

“Be there as much as you can!” Patton half-shouted, “You can’t spread yourself too thin! You’ll crack-”

“Then I’ll crack!” Roman shrieked, “I’d crack myself into a million pieces if it meant helping people-”

Virgil stood up, “Roman,” he said gently, “That’s- you’d destroy yourself-”

“Well, what’s the point in helping people if you just pull back when you get uncomfortable!?”

“Taking care of _yourself_ -”

“Doesn’t _MATTER_!” the other two were staring at him, and Roman reached up to wipe his eyes, which smeared his make up, “... I- I’m sorry-” and he threw himself out the door and into the hallway.

“So,” Roman rubbed his eyes, “Let me get this straight- we’re on a _trip_ , and we’re having McDonald’s for lunch?”

Patton elbowed him, “Roman- be nice,”

Virgil elbowed Roman harder, “Yeah, jackass,”

“Fine,”

Remus grumbled, “Uh-huh,”

“What are you so grumpy about, there, kiddo?” Patton asked, “You still feelin’ a bit sick?”

“... That’s a word for it,”

Patton nodded, “That sucks. Well- if you aren’t feeling up to it we won’t shame you for going back to the hotel,”

Remus nodded, and Dee set the tray down, taking his fiance’s hand, “He’s right- we can go, if you like,”

“I’m fine,”

Dee nodded, “Alright- well, I... I have something to say to everyone, I guess,” he wasn’t really looking at them, more at his hands, and said, “I want to change my name!”

Virgil nodded, “Fuck yeah dude, valid. What to?”

“... Janus,”

Virgil’s eyes lit up, “Like the Roman god?”

“That’s the one!”

Roman- heh- snorted, “I like it!”

Janus looked ready to cry, and just kind of leaned onto Remus, “I... Thank you, guys. Really. Thank you...”

“It’s alright, love,” Remus assured him, “I told you they wouldn’t be shitty about it,”

“Yeah-” Janus smiled, “Anxiety, I guess,”

Virgil grinned, “Oh, mood,” he reached over to take Janus’ hand, “Hey- dude, we still love you. We always will,”

“... Thank you Virgil,”

“No problem,”

“... Yes sir, I understand- right away-” Patton paused in the hallway. He turned on his heel, finding Logan in the stairwell of the hotel, on the phone and speaking in English, “I understand. I understand,”

“Kiddo?” Patton offered, and Logan lept nearly 3 feet. He was clearly half-awake, still in just his pyjama pants and literally nothing else, not even his glasses. His hair was a mess, and he stared at Patton like he’d just materialized out of the wall, “Logan, are you-”

He just motioned for Patton to be quiet, “Just other people talking in the hallway, sir. Yes, yes... Right away. Good bye,” he pulled his hand back, ended the call, and slid down the wall.

“Oh, kiddo!” Patton slid down to his side, sitting on the stair above the one Logan was sitting on, “What’s wrong?”

“I.. Did you understand a word of that?” he looked so _tired_.

Patton nodded, “Yeah- one of my dads is from America. I speak English pretty well- what’s goin’ on?”

“... My father saw one of the pictures Roman posted on Instagram,” he said. His hands where shaking, and Patton dug around in his pockets for his fidget cube, handing it out to him, “I-” Logan started to _cry_ \- not really sob, but tears just kind of _fell_ , “... Thank you,”

“No problem, kiddo. What’s the problem with him seeing one of Roman’s posts?”

“He... Doesn’t like me doing things that are irrelevant to my academic pursuits,”

Patton frowned, “You’re, like, one of the top students in the whole school! It’s reading week! What does he want you to do, study for a whole week!?”

“Yes,” Logan said, as if that wasn’t absolutely crazy, “And... And he is right- this has been... Wonderful. More wonderful than you can imagine- but my studies are most important-”

“Logan,” Patton raised a hand, and Logan’s mouth snapped shut, “ _You_ are most important. _You_ and _your mental health_ are the most important thing here, okay?”

Logan nodded rapidly, reaching up to wipe his tears before returning to the fidget cube, “I- yes. Alright... But I cannot simply say no to him,”

“Why not?” Patton asked, “Is he going to hurt you?”

“He pays my tuition- there are worse things he can do than hurting me physically,”

“If he cuts you off, I’ll talk to my dads,” Patton assured him, “They’re paying Virge’s already- his parents are fucking awful, so just... Let me know, okay?”

“That...” Logan stared at him, “That is appreciated, but ultimately unnecessary,”

“Nope- if he cuts you off because he wants to control you, Logan, then we’re here for you,”

“...” Logan stared at his hands, “Control...?” he repeated, “I... I never thought about it like that before,”

“That’s what it sounds like to me,” Patton said, “We’ll take you back to Paris if you want to go, but if you don’t-”

“I do not,” Logan assured him, “I... At least until Remus is well enough to travel,”

Patton smiled, “Alrighty then. You wanna go back to your room, or do you wanna come to Virgil and me’s?”

“.... I... Do not wish to awaken Roman,”

“Take it that means you’re comin’ with me?”

“That would... Be desirable, yes,”

“Then come along, Lo!”

“Lo...” he repeated it with a soft little smile on his face, “That... That is also desirable,”

And so, when Roman stumbled in to Patton and Virgil’s room 20 minutes later, still upset, he found the 3 of them already lying together on the floor in a pile of blankets.

And so he joined, and Logan was not sure if he would ever be as happy as he was right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me: :(  
> lamp: exists  
> me: :)

**Author's Note:**

> Join the discord server! https://discord.gg/VbDEFCm


End file.
